esrosedotblog

Today is the first day of the California plastic bag ban.

I have been using canvas bring-my-own bags for quite a while.

What amazes me is that even with those cotton bags, some baggers ignore them and start to give me a plastic one anyway.

This will create all hell for a lot of people. Good thing.

For me, the best part is that it is a dramatic statement of priorities in a world that seems to have none where ecological concerns are given mostly lip service.

My bags are old. Heavy cotton, they have been laundered a few times.

And they are strong to the point of indestructibility.

They didn't cost much either.

I am proud to live in a state that has the balls to be first on stuff like this.

California Plastic Bag Ban

Labels: conservation

Today's film is an old fashioned melodrama.

There is an ill fated romance and nothing ends well in

Bangkok Love Story (2008)

A male prostitute falls in love with his client and the feelings are mutual.

Nothing good can come to this. It is still the 19th Century in Thailand.

But on the way there is some beautiful photography, very nice scenery, good looking young men and plenty of action. The one guy is in the mob after all. He has been sent to off the other one, a witness.

I liked it a lot. In fact we already bought it on word of mouth and reviews. So that makes it a 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

Today's film is a film about making a film.

I love those. And this one is no exception.

Behind the scenes is where all the action takes place in

Sex is Comedy (2004)

This film is all about filming one sex scene. Amazing. Of course, there is background and filler. But the main event is the very public operation of an intimate act.

Actors, director, crew. All have a place in this funny but also quite awkward tribute to the very hard work of making an entertaining and even titillating scene happen.

I think that making it a comedy was right but it also upped the ante in that being funny would rob the sexuality of its intensity. This does not happen.

Eventually when the scene is finally completed, done, in the can, the relief is really great. Well, like a sexual release.

I cannot imagine this film being made in Hollywood. The finesse of its presentation preserves a kind of erotic suspense that keeps us totally involved. At least me. And it is a heterosexual scene. Although the "hero" is pretty handsome. Gregoire Colin is an old favorite and he is the male half. Anne Parillaud is the female. Their chemistry has a huge range from just actors doing a job not caring much about one another to the final scene which we get to see in full glory.

Wow. What a great film. I would want to see this again some time.

That makes it a 4 out of Netflix 5. Maybe a 5 which would mean that I will commit to another viewing in the future. Maybe I will buy it.

Labels: films, sex, sexuality

This is still one of my favorite movies.

I don't know when I first saw

In Bruges (2008)

I suppose six years ago. Arithmetic.

I have seen it at least five times. Once a year, sort of.

And it still works.

Written and directed by Martin MacDonaugh. That is the key. Superb work.

Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson are hit men on the run. They work for Ralph Fiennes who has sent them out of England to cool off in, of all places, Bruges, Belgium.

Because the Boss, Fiennes, had a wonderful time in the town. "It is like a fucking fairy tale, i'nt it?"

I don't know what most appeals to me in this film. Maybe just everything. The fun, the suspense, the inappropriate humor. Dwarfs. Dead kids. Cathedrals.

I don't want to tell the story because, well, you know.

And it is utterly beautiful. The city, the town, Bruges.

I feel as if I have been there. Of course, I have seen the sights five or six times.

This is such a 5 out of Netflix5!

Labels: best films, films

So, the AC is off for the winter.

We came back from Las Vegas to find a temperature drop. It was expected. Just like that. Life in the desert.

This means that for awhile there will be no artificial climatizing. Eventually we will need some heat but not yet. This is the unassisted living period.

We took Marcus for his first Sunday walk and it was quite a success. He goes out front as if he knows just where he is going and is good at picking up the non-verbal cues from us to make the right turns.

He walks very fast. A good pace. Good for us. We took a large but not the largest loop and took 45 minutes. He was slowing a bit at the end (as were we).

The air is crisp and dry and just about perfect.

Now, the dog and husband are napping and I am not too far after. In an hour. I do have my schedule to keep.

Labels: seasons

I liked this a lot.

It is quite unusual to have access to any Cirque de Soliel production at no cost. Just sayin'.

These are quadcopters. Something new. And wonderful in the right hands. I want one.

The making of....

Labels: fun

We went and picked up Marcus this morning and brought him back to his new home.

Not the same name we had before actually. He was "Mikey" and now he is Marcus.

We have not consulted him about this.

I was going to slide into it with Markie but John says no. I do not think Marcus gives a shit. He has enough to adapt to.

We had a good ride back. He "rode well". Meaning that he looked out the windows a lot, lay down and rested, came between our seats for a bit of a snuggle and never took a nap the entire way.

I didn't either.

At home, he seems to be taking it all in his stride. Everything is new but, at the same time, we have already started bonding. So any place we are is going to become home.

He is lying just behind me as I type. He hasn't gotten that he has a nice crate pad to lie on just in front of me. I am not the motherly type so I have not tried to get him to use the pad. All in his own time.

We have been outside and went across the way to pee and get the mail. Fortunately, while we were gone, the weather did a fast cool down so the pavement was not too hot and the air was good.

I do not know what else to say.

He is very affectionate and is interested in both of us. He does not beg in the kitchen and I am not about to get that started. So far he does not get up on beds but that is not a first day thing. He will be allowed if he wishes.

We do not know what rules he has lived by but he is in pretty good shape with his manners. Serene too. Not easily spooked. Wants to do the right thing.

He is getting the picture in a very nice way and I have caught him snoozing some.

We are just taking it easy on all of us.

John and I are reversing our walk time assignment. I am going to give the morning walk and not go to the gym. For the foreseeable future.

The dog walk will be as good as 30 minutes on a bike and the weight machines have not been taken seriously in some time. I go through the motions but at 78 I am not pushing it.

I may change this later. I will certainly miss the social time in the gym but because of attrition there are really only two or three people who I will miss. And I can always go back for a visit.

Labels: dog, Marcus

We are off to Las Vegas tomorrow to meet Mikey.

He is a seven year old Airedale who is in rescue as a result of the aging of his humans.

It almost goes without saying that once we meet him we will definitely bring him home with us on Saturday.

We have a lot of trust in Rusty, the airedale rescue Mom and she thinks we are a good fit.

We thought we were done with dogs but then realized after six months of mourning Booker that we were not finished with the pitter and patter of not so little feet in the house.

So we started the process. And it is taking on its own momentum.

This morning we went to PetSmart and loaded up on supplies. We had gotten rid of all our gear so we need to gear up again. I am not sorry that we did this. Booker's dog bed had his name on it. A lot of his stuff had his mark.

Mikey is not going to be Booker or, for that matter, Franklin who preceded.

We will leave tomorrow morning, go meet Mikey and, if all is well, will go back to pick him up Saturday morning. We will all come back to Palm Springs. A new start.

John built a plywood platform so he has a nice space in the back seat and there are plenty of straps and all to hold him in.

We will not have the top down of course. But he still needs to be safe.

We have the bowls and the food and the new 27 foot lead on a spring roll. We know how to do this thing. We are very experienced Dads.

I have read Alison Bechdel's comic strips for a very long time.

Dykes to Watch Out For

Now it is called graphic fiction. Or something. I also have her autobiographical novel, Fun Home which uses her approach to the comic strip to tell her own life story. She had a closeted gay father. Just to put some extra spin on it.

Bechdel just received a Macarthur Grant for her work. A wonderful recognition with some cash on the side.

Here she is talking about her reaction to receiving the grant and talks about her work.

If you want to know more about Bechdel and also look at her archives go here.

The other thing is that the strips are not just about dykes or, in fact, principally about them. It is about funny people, political people, who happen to be lesbians.

Labels: gay culture, gay fiction, gay life

More gay shorts today.

And that is enough for awhile.

Some of them were very good. One or two were excellent. Another one maybe shouldn't have been in the mix. Just didn't cut it.

But that is par for the course in a film short collection.

There is a whole series of these on DVD. I have a few of them now. And that is enough. I will keep my eye out for a more selective or discriminating collector but that is probably like saying that I will be on the lookout for my double. A connoisseur with exactly my taste.

Unlikely to say the least.

Straight Men and the Men Who Love Them 3

I think that the title is attempting irony.

Labels: films, gay films

Autumn starts today somewhere.

We used to have it when we lived in Boston.

No more.

If we want to see leaf color we could drive up the mountain.

Any one of them.

I am not really nostalgic about leaves. Colored or otherwise.

There are some maple trees in our condo landscaping. On the other side. The original section.

It is surprising to see that they perform pretty well. Autumn and colors included. I think that there are three trees.

I would get to see them when walking the dog.

Which, I will be doing again by the end of the week. We go Friday to pick up Marcus.

Las Vegas. Where we got Booker.

If Marcus is half the pal that Booker was we will be well served.

I have no intention of comparing them. It is not Marcus' job to replace Booker. He will be himself which will be plenty.

Labels: condo, dog, seasons

Today's film was actually a compendium of gay shorts.

I am not sure where such work is distributed or shown. Certainly film festivals.

But short movies do not exist anymore in theaters unless somehow, somewhere one of those rerun places manage to do it.

Here we go. Nostalgia. When I was a kid, movies were 90 minutes long. There were always shorts.

Before television, there was the newsreel. Changed every week. Also news magazines on film. Time Marches On. Cartoons of course. Travelogues. Yes, they were called that. Comedies. Some comedians made their reputations with them. Edgar Kennedy, Abbot and Costello (although they were able to overlap with television), many silent stars who could not carry a feature.

Now, the only thing shorter than the main feature, in fact the only other thing, are ads or trailers. Or ads.

This is certainly one reason that I quit going to movies. Many more. But with DVD there are no shorts. Until recently. And here they are in a number of compilations which I won't list. They are easily obtained through Amazon or some other web outlet. There are no DVDs except special interest ones. Today's are gay. There are others with music videos and so on.

Labels: films, gay films

When I was a kid, my Dad managed a small grocery store in Canadensis, PA.

We lived not too far away.

This is the area that the fugitive sniper Eric Frein is now using as his hiding place.

And he is still hiding successfully.

Nine Days In, No Contact With Trooper Killer

A lot of this area is still basically wilderness. I was not a woodsman or a hunter but my Dad was and he roamed all over the area for his whole life and knew the ins and outs of hunting and being in the wild.

It is a little deceptive to realize this is also a resort community with thousands of summer travelers. But, like a lot of places, the tourists only go into small areas. A lot more space is devoted to deep dark woods.

If you wanted to get lost you could find some good hiding places within a short walk of my family's home. We played all the variations of good/bad guys, built forts, and basically dodged parents in these woods. Once we were in there no one would find us.

For us, getting in and getting out was second nature. It was a learned skill set from the first times that we were allowed to run with other kids. Passed on from one gang to another.

My memory of the area is so vivid that I believe I could still navigate it and be hidden for quite a long time. Food, water and shelter would be a problem. But survivalists don't have this concern as much. Sooner or later they are going to have to give in but that would be a lot later than anyone may think.

Other male cousins (girls never went into the woods) who hunted had far more experience with this. Favorite trees to sit in to await game were kept as deep dark secrets.

At some point my interest in all of this, being nil, led to a life apart. Books and other ways to wile away my time.

Labels: life, wildlife

Our search for a new airedale to share our life is getting close to a conclusion.

I hope.

Friday, we are going to Las Vegas to visit Mikey who is 7 years old and in need of a home.

He would be staying at the same place that we got Booker six years ago.

We are excited.

It has been too long without a canine friend.

Well, four months. That is a long time in dog years!

We don't know a lot but this is a good thing. We never did get a thorough history of our wonderful Booker who passed the end of April. And while he came without references, he did have a good month of observation by the rescue people who are pretty careful about these things.

I am not sure whether he will remain Mikey or not. That is up to him and to us.

It is a bit exciting and a little scary. An important event in all our lives, Mikey included.

Otherwise, things are quiet. John is settled after his Italian journey and my travels simmered down a long time ago.

Now on to the next phase.

No photos of Mikey but all airedales look the same from a distance. It is in the close ups that they endear and enchant, each in its own way.

Labels: Airedale, dog

Today was mostly consumed with going to the doc for an annual checkup on my kidneys.

I did a test and the results were there and I am good to go. Get it?

I don't have many infirmities or health problems but I do have "conditions". This means that signs of wear are showing up here and there and they need to be poked and picked at from time to time.

The kidney problem was associated with my urinary difficulties last year. A chain of events when one of the units has trouble.

But all is well now. I do the tests, I see the medicos. In this case a nurse practitioner who I like very much.

OK for another year.

Labels: health

Today's movie was the first disc of the first season of

The Big Bang Theory (2007)

It is well known that I don't watch television but if I did this would definitely be a "don't miss" series. I watched the first of three discs that cover the first season.

It was pretty good. I will watch another disc sometime soon.

There is no describing comedy. Who would guess that two physicist roommates would provide a lot of comic grist? I would. When I was at MIT I lived on a floor of almost all Physics majors. They are pretty hilarious.

There is ballast. The girl across the hall. And there is a hint of a relationship between her and one of the geeks. Just a hint. One of the guys is actually modeled on a queer stereotype, very flighty hands, but they have chosen to make him asexual. Blatantly so. It is a pretty good idea since this allows them to plug in all the funny stuff without being politically incorrect. Or homophobic.

Fact is it is played like a hidden secret. In plain view. Which I suppose makes it homophobic but I didn't take it that way. Besides, there are a lot of flighty straight guys. Just sayin'.

I will watch the second disc as I couldn't stop watching this one straight through. With the FF on the credits it takes about two hours.

So far a 5 out of Netflix5 because I am going on with it.

Labels: comedy, television

The worm has turned; back from whence it came.

Pass the Word: The Phone Call Is Back

Let's face it. Email is the only successful alternative to voice. Even then it is subject to all kinds of typos and other weird errors. It takes time to type it in.

Text? No way. It is well out of my territory. I never started.

Basically, I am a die hard voice guy. I want to hear yours and I want you to hear mine. And I like the interchange of voices deciding in the here and now (hear and now) what is going on with each other.

Sure. A long email message is helpful. I use it to "call" all my kids. For one thing I can email them all at one time. Five separate emails? No. They respond in the same way. Never text.

But day to day contact? No way will I text. I am an easy study in the use of texting. I never started.

Oh, I will grudgingly indulge in a bit of back and forth. But I will quickly say, "hey I will call you".

Call me old fashioned.

I amaze some young friends when I show them my phone. A clamshell. Old style.

Of course, that makes texting more difficult for me but that's the way I like it.

I don't even want to get used to doing it.

I think that my aversion to texting arises out of several places. One is that it is just fucking inconvenient. Calling? Easy. Hit the fast dial and get a connection. Even if the person is not there I can leave a voice message.

Is it OK to say that I just enjoy it more? Intertalk is much more satisfying.

Another thing. Texting is all about abbreviation. A sure sign that it is a tedious chore. This leads to even less communications.

I could use Skype or iChat more if I had partners who wanted to do it. It is unhandy. Appointments required. On the desktop, well, I have to be at my desk. On my iPad you have to sort of hold it out like a book, arms length. Maybe the "phones" are better for seeing but I doubt it. I don't even want to try.

If the phone phone was good enough for Alexander Bell, it is good enough for me.

Labels: culture, phone

I feel pretty remote from the place I grew up in.

But it feels a lot closer, suddenly, when I see something about it in the news.

Manhunt Continues in Killing of Pennsylvania Trooper

All of this hits my lower spinal cord or something. The place where instinct lies. I actually felt some fear.

Weird business, this instinct stuff.

I have not been back there for awhile. Not since my mother passed. I have some cousins but I have been out of touch for a very long time. The one second cousin who I have kept up with moved to Florida last year. The last feeble connection.

But, I still have kin there so the emotions are aroused.

Sometimes, I surprise myself. That automatic self that lies hidden under the pretense and sophistication. Also the years. I haven't been in or around those "woods" for sixty years.

They sure do look the same.

Labels: Pennsylvania

I left today's film early.

Too much excess baggage. Too much of Tom Hanks. Way to much self regard about itself. Hokum.

Cloud Atlas (2013)

Let's dispose of Hanks first. He has become a bore. Droning on in his lines. Being Tom Hanks.

It is hard to translate a good novel to the screen because it will always be diminished. A bad novel is a better transfer because the film can save the narrative and do the showing which weak writing fails to do.

I did read the book and therein lies the problem I am sure. It is a very very good book. Complete within itself. I had my own ideas of what it was about.

Admittedly, it is hard to translate this work and I suppose the two directors it took did as well as could be expected.

Hoist by my own expectations.

So I won't go on about it. I have a lifetime problem with Hanks who left my pool of regard when started taking himself so seriously. He excelled at light comedy, romantic comedy. Here he is heavy and plodding.

Blah blah blah.

For me this is a 2 out of Netflix5. Well, actually, a 1 because I didn't finish it.

Labels: films

John returned home this morning.

He drove his rental car back, turned it in at the airport and was home before I left for my condo board meeting at 9AM.

Nice timing.

I was glad to see him of course. I had to get used to his being around again. It took about five minutes if that.

Good thing because I took off for the monthly condo board meeting. It takes place across the street, at the east pool. Outdoors of course. The heat is turned down now. Lots of chairs and tables.

Nice businesslike setting.

We skipped last month but we probably should not have. There was some stuff that happened we are a little late out of the box for. I won't be so ready to vote yes on the summer vacation next year. Live and learn.

The meeting was not momentous. There were people there with some problems. Stolen items from cars which is not our business. A complaint about a neighbor's tree hanging over a wall. Cut it off. Up to you and the neighbor, we do not adjudicate neighbor issues.

The biggest item was the review of comments which have come in for the new architectural guidelines. At least an hour.

We are about to publish the final drafts and so there were some last minute additions to vote on.

I read my financial report which is pretty cut and dried. We are only 700 dollars shy on budget versus actual for the year after 10 months. Good news. It is all written for me but I do consult with the professional manager before the meeting. I sign the result and recite it. Moment in the sun.

Some agenda items drag on. We are trying to buy out the last of the lease for the property under our east side tract. Less than half the condos. The seller is the indian tribe and so it moves very slowly as there are many "owners" who have to sign off on it.

There is no doubt it will happen.

There were condo owners attending who had questions and complaints which were heard. Some were "just watching" us. And we were done in record time. Two hours. Early enough for me to get home and have my morning nap pretty much on schedule.

Labels: condo, life

Today's film is about incest.

Homosexual, consensual sex between two brothers.

There. That is out of the way. Once we clear the underbrush we have this wonderful film about a lifelong relationship between two brothers.

Do Começo ao Fim / From Beginning to End (2009)

That this is a controversial subject, no question. That being said, it is true, I hear, that many brothers do enjoy a sexual relationship at some point in their lives that is not coercive and is shared fully. It is when that relationship grows and becomes permanent that the moral police and probably some shrinks cry out that there is something wrong.

This film skates over all of this. The relationship between two brothers is carefully followed from birth to maturity and there is a wonderful continuity between their childhood and adult affection for one another.

We are left to wonder what will happen next when finally, after a period of separation, both realize they want to continue to live together.

I am optimistic.

This film does not blink once. It is beautiful and fulfilling and, perhaps, just a fantasy but a nice one. I don't have a brother but I certainly fantasized about having one. My imaginary playmate grew up.

This is a very nice film and I enjoyed watching it again. A 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

Today's movie was a charmer if slightly unbelievable.

But that is what movies are best at. Rendering the unbelievable as possible and, what's more, wonderful in only 90 minutes.

In a Day (2007)

is one of those small films that get lost in the shuffle. Big at a festival but no distribution prospects. Into the DVD slush in hopes that someone, somewhere, will eventually see them.

I liked it. I am not sure how I found out about it but probably another viewer with a DVD review column liked it too.

A young couple meets over coffee. He orders one at her coffee shop. She has been having a bad day and the guy is a bright contrast to her experience so far.

So she accepts the invite to spend the day together. And they do. And this is the result.

I liked it. It is, in a word, cute. It hit me at just the right time. I will give it a 3 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films

I am beginning to "endure" with John's being away.

At the beginning it was fun, then it became routine and now it is getting a little tough to handle.

The house is very quiet.

I have stuff to do but nothing essential to the family care and welfare.

I will do the Friday shopping tomorrow in preparation for his Saturday return.

In the meantime, it is getting to be a bit of a grind.

It is probably good for me. I need an occasional reminder of what it is like to be alone. Especially not to have the kind of routines that we have designed for and with one another. The us part of it.

Two more dinners out alone. Another full day before he arrives.

There is stuff to do but it is pretty thin stuff.

Absence does make the heart grow fonder. Also to point out the enjoyability of the coupled life.

Today's film is not just another hustler movie.

The difference is in the people, primarily the hustler himself who moves from the cold hard facts of his job to the realization that he really likes his job. He likes the people and identifies with them. Hence, realizing he is "probably" gay.

Strapped (2010)

There is no denying that this is an exploitation film. There is not a lot of plot, serial sexual encounters when a hustler gets lost in a building he has visited for a client.

A contrivance but one that works as he encounters a compendium of gay situations. People project on him what they want him to be.

He helps them out. He is very good at it. As he collects his money.

Yet, each one, progressively, leads him to a series of insights about himself. I suppose that this is really an allegory. Sexy, but full of moral lessons, nonetheless.

The title is a little distant from an obvious connection but all the participants hustler and clients, are, in a way strapped in place. Or strapped for funds, material and emotional.

I don't want to make too much of it. I really like this film and think that it deserves a lot more recognition than it got.

Everyone in it is good at what they are doing. The hustler, Ben Bonenfant is magnetic.

I cannot see that any of the people connected with this went on to bigger or better things. There are a lot of films like that. One time shots that are wonderful in and of themselves.

I have seen this several times and it is part of our DVD collection. A 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

I am always interested in the MacArthur Award winners. The "genius" grant.

MacArthur Awards Go to 21 Diverse Fellows

The annual event is one of the most prestigious events for artists, a term that has a rather wide meaning where the MacArthurs are concerned.

This year a particular thrill to see that Alison Bechdel, a wonderful writer and cartoonist is one of the winners.

Bechdel is the creator of a series of cartoons depicting lesbian life and is the author of an autobiographical graphic book called Fun Home which I am sure that I reviewed here a long time ago.

I have gotten a lot of pleasure from seeing her work and am so happy to see her receive this substantial financial gift for her work.

She had a website, Dykes to Watch Out For which I would regularly "watch out for" on my daily internet travels. She has since retired that site to do the later books as well as to take advantage of several scholarly projects.

Such good news.

Her cartoons managed to bring humor to the counterculture without compromising the point. They covered a wide range of the PC territory.

Labels: cartoons, counterculture, humor, lesbians

The guys came to prune my "personal" trees today..

That means any tree that is inside the courtyard. We have a Palo Verde.

The condo association contractor does it and the owner pays them directly. But the whole procedure for paying is a work in progress.

I still owe them for the work.

It is hard to separate my board membership from being just an owner in a case like this.

The system is new and doesn't work very well. No one knows how to collect payment for the work.

I gave up. I will let them call me or send a bill.

But it isn't OK with me to have it done for nothing.

For now, I will be patient and enjoy the trimmed tree.

Well not for awhile. The pruned tree is pretty starkly naked. Which is the way to do it. New growth will fill in fast and in less than a month or two there will be new fuller growth. In this photo you can see one tree finished and another about to be done. Not ours but like ours.

Labels: landscaping

Father and gay son is the theme of today's film.

It is a fraught relationship and requires a lot of forgiveness and understanding on both sides.

I know. It took awhile but my Dad and I were able to traverse that path and come out the other end not only reconciled but with true understanding between us.

This is the theme of today's French Canadian film

C.R.A.Z.Y (2005)

This is a true favorite. Meaning that it is so special that I hold it in my heart between viewings.

Here there are four sons and a close family. When one of the sons finally comes out to himself and the rest of the world there is a kind of knot that has to be untied then tied again.

This is a very good film. Very true. There is no miracle of discovery, it is painfully gradual and then when it comes there is no immediate solution except to begin living in the real world together. Father and son.

There is a subplot with one brother, the favorite, who turns out to be, well, that is for you to see in the film.

A 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

It hasn't been all movies at esrosedotblog.

John is still in Italy and I am having a normal, without him, life.

I have kept up the routine.

Today was gym at 4AM and a Meeting at 7AM and then some regular morning watering, cleaning, napping, computering.

Some phone calls.

None from John today. Or to him either.

We are coming up on a condo Board meeting on Saturday so there is some scurrying around for that.

As Treasurer I have to sign off on the Financials and also read the prepped report to the Board. I like to go over what I am going to read in advance so the management guy sent me the numbers and a draft report. Which I never change.

We are ending up the year just about on target for the budget. A little excess.

After my morning nap, I had some lunch, watched the movie reported on for today and then did some on line cruising.

Out to Elmer's, a favorite spot, for dinner. Then home and this. So before I know it, I am all done with the day.

Somewhere in there was calling in and picking up my prescriptions. Not many for an old guy.

Now, the end of the day. Bed. Start up tomorrow.

I have to work a lab visit in here sometime this week as I have my kidney guy next Monday. I am working to get the lab order somehow tomorrow then go in the morning next day. Visit is next Monday. This is the annual and I assume everything is OK. But once they get their mitts on you they do not let go. Followups.

It is OK. Better not to be surprised. I have had no symptoms at all.

I had to renew TimeWarner Cable payments. Another year another credit card. I am always a bit doubtful that it all works. I will check a couple of days before the current subscription ends.

Just a lot of little shit to keep me busy. A good thing.

Now off to bed.

Labels: films, life

Today's film is a meditative piece about an eastern/western relationship in Hong Kong.

At one level it is a straight forward romance and at another it is meditation on love and longing.

This is from the DVD collection so I have seen it before.

Part of it takes place in Switzerland as flashback amidst a lot of mist and rain.

Tragedy looms just in the background.

The relationship is nice to see. Falling in love is not all that angst ridden. It is just that circumstances conspire to make this a tragic film. Beauty comes at a cost.

I am a bit suspicious of the sad outcome. It echoes a bit the old films where the homo had to be punished for his sins.

But that does not drag it down. Sad things actually do happen to gay men in relationships and they are not necessarily the result of the gay but of the usual factors that make real love difficult.

A 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

A gay man is also a Momma's boy.

But until he unwinds himself, he cannot be free to have his own life or for his Mom to have hers.

This is a kind of stereotypical picture of the gay man/mom story and it often true enough to border on the cliché.

But this wonderful and surprising film avoids the clichés and shows that love can survive all the pressures of social and parental judgment. To say nothing of maintaining a good relationship between the parent and the boy.

I didn't have a lot of luck with this myself but the people in this film manage it. They dodge the expected and together continue their adventurous lives together.

Le Fil / The String (2010)

Claudia Cardinale stars as the mother in this French North African (Arab) family comedy/drama.

I really like this movie. I have seen it several times and know how it will turn out and what happens along the way. None of this compromises the sweet emotions that come from watching the proceedings.

It helps that the gay couple who have to endure tradition are handsome and the women who just happen to be lesbian with the same "marriage problem" are funny and wonderful.

It is all very good natured once Mom gets out of the way.

I am not so sure it always happens this way but it is nice to think that it can. It did for me. More or less. One mother ended up happy about it all while the other gritted her teeth.

Guess who we had a better time with and enjoyed being with to the end.

A 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

So, after going out to dinner I came back and watched another film from our gay DVD file.

Mine vagrant / Loose Cannons (2013)

A gay son returns home after several years in Rome where he has a career as a writer and a gay lover.

Father is a typically macho, head of the family and owner of a big pasta factory. He hopes for the son to be head of the pasta factory. The oldest son has disqualified by beating everyone else to the punch and coming out first. He got disowned.

And so on.

Opera buffo.

Complications include a lover who visits along with all the gay friends. Sooner or later the game will have to be up.

This is a farce with most of the farce being on the straight side of the family.

Very enjoyable and I did buy the DVD so it is a 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

Remember the Pepsi Challenge?

I have lived it out over the years and come out a Coke man.

Yet, we have both colas in the refrigerator as John comes out for Pepsi.

Every once in a while I think "this is silly". And I decide to try the Pepsi.

It never works. I am back to Coke in no time.

Perhaps it is because I worked for Coke for many years and trained many of their salesmen and middle managers. I made a lot of money off them. I also worked for Pepsi but not as much. Actually, I have never been brand loyal for a client.

Maybe there is more caffeine in Coke. It was always rumored but no one knows the "secret formula" of either.

Being client aware in the super market is not something I tried to attain.

I worked for Procter and Gamble for years and never much thought about brand loyalty to them. And there was so much I couldn't keep track of all that was theirs.

Even back when I worked for Ocean Spray I didn't always buy their products. Well, the sauce but not the drinks. And even then I would buy house brand sauce without a twinge because I knew OS made it and it was the same stuff usually for less money.

It bothers me to have both Colas taking up the cooler room. But there it is.

Neither John nor I will cross over. Loyal to the end.

It is not a big deal but it is something I thought of as I went for my afternoon draft. And I am thirsty for a blog item.

Also, I need to have my Coke while I do this.

Labels: life

John is halfway through his trip.

We talked this morning and he is doing fine but, like me I think, he is on the downside of the "away from home" curve. By the time he gets here next Saturday, it will be just in time.

I do find myself a bit aimless from time to time, then I gather myself up and remember that this is my "freedom" for the year. My time alone at home to, well, do something not normal.

But I am not doing that.

Except for going out to eat which I do enjoy. Up to a point.

It may be (gasp) another two movie day.

Labels: life

Today's film from our DVD library involves a kidnapping.

No Regret (2009)

This is one of those films that is basically a genré film only in gay terms; made in Korea. Lots of good gay films from Korea.

A prostitute seduces a rich client who falls in love with him and wants to spend more time. Which they do, but since the plan was to continue the relationship and then kidnap the client, all falls apart when the young male hustler also falls in love in the process.

This means that the scheme must be unwound with a minimum of hurt to all involved.

It is pretty well done and stays in form with a satisfying ending. The men are attractive, except the villains, this being a kind of Korean soap opera. Not much sex but that isn't necessary. Love is in the forefront here.

Oddly it is all believable while I am watching and I enjoyed it enough the first time to buy it and to see it again. An automatic 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

Today's gay DVD film is about the last night before a gay man leaves San Francisco for his childhood home in Ohio.

I Want Your Love (2013)

In this delightfully sad tale, just about every San Francisco gay stereotype is ticked off the checklist drenched in the fog, the easy sex and the lack of any form of commitment. Jobs, friends, lovers.

There is a lot of sex. All of it rendered in a naturalistic way. Unvarnished surroundings. The Castro style.

The film is totally consistent with my experience of the place. It is not hypocritical. Or overly supportive. It is easy to see how things are done and not done here. It is a bit of an anthology movie with sexual situations as the chapters.

Good sex. Not bad. Erotic. Not porno-esque. A lot of moles and zits and not everyone has a big dick.

No perfect bodies and mostly nice people.

Somehow Travis Matthews has managed to go 111 minutes without any misstep. It is very well done. One can easily put himself (no women) into the picture. Having been to the city myself, as a tourist, I can find a few of the people I met and spent time with.

In a way there is nothing special about San Francisco and, in another, it is totally unique. The film loses no opportunity to set the stage. Great photography.

It is an easy 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

I went and retrieved the Volvo from the dealer service today.

They had to replace a chip in the starter electronics and do some kind of upload of info.

A 21st Century ailment.

A minor annoyance which I sort of blew out of proportion. I didn't have plans for using the car. But without it I felt twinges of anxiety which made no sense.

It is my experience that trying to reason with ones self in these circumstances is not very useful. The angst is there. Trying to explain it only makes it stick out more.

There is the "do I want to go out to eat" thing. Followed by a few "what ifs" like needing it for an emergency.

And so on.

I had fun with the driver who brought me home yesterday and the car this morning.

A natural born desert rat who can't wait to get out of the desert. And that would be to Boston!

As far as he can figure to go without traveling overseas. He has a friend at Wentworth and will be going to join him. He has no idea of work once he gets there. Carefree.

He has never been cold, never seen snow, never had the pleasure of thick immovable traffic.

It made a kind of unpleasant experience interesting. I didn't need the car but doing without it felt bad. I am an American.

I don't get too nostalgic about Boston but everyone in awhile I surprise myself.

Labels: Boston, nostalgia

Today's movie is an Italian version of many many such tales.

An international cliché.

Come non detto / Tell No One (2012)

Matteo is leaving town and has one thing he has never told his family. That he is gay. He has a job in Spain and his boyfriend is going with him.

This is another coming out of the closet stories. And it is charming and funny and gentle on all the people in the family as well as the two young men.

It is not a great work of art but it is fun and enjoyable and never ever crosses the PC line. This in Italy.

It is light, perhaps even fluff but I am glad that it was finally subtitled and put in an American wrapper.

A 5 out of Netflix5.

I interrupted my showing of our gay DVD collection to see this. But it is now part of the collection so I guess it will be alright.

Labels: films

I was 65 years old before I ever heard the word "homeland" except in a connection with immigrants.

As in "my great grand parents' homeland was Germany".

In that sense, I have never thought about the United States as "my homeland". But now, more and more, people are saying this. I think that it reeks of xenophobia. The hatred of other countries. Inappropriate national pride.

But, I guess, I am in a minority.

I thought that I was the only one who noticed this sudden use of the H word. But I guess not.

How ‘Homeland’ Became Part of Our American Lexicon

Well, not my lexicon. I don't and won't ever use this word.

Maybe because it seems that it started with George W. Bush. But, more than that, it is the sort of old fashioned "my country right or wrong" thinking.

To me it connotes bullying. I know. It is what I am putting on it.

I am glad someone wrote this article. I felt alone.

I always associated this word with dictatorships and oppression.

Since Georgie boy started it the word has become a department which makes the kind of nationalistic flourish a formal reality.

I guess I just see it as a way of flaunting our power in the world. More penis waving. Which is definitely not needed if it ever was.

Labels: language, words

It is amazing how quiet it is without John here.

Do we talk that much? Probably.

I don't even think of him as talkative. Phones and so on. Visitors. But there it is. Quiet.

An unexpected outcome of all our time together is that we talk all the time.

My parents didn't.

Somehow I equated a long time together with increasing quiet. To the contrary, it seems that we have even more to talk about.

Certainly, to the extent that we have a very full life, there is never a dearth of material to sort over. Dearth. A great word. One "r" from "death". Near death.

Not so here.

I do miss him and it has not been a week. Partly, there is stuff still going on. The world does not stop.

There is another new airedale at the rescue place. A second one. First there was Ace and now there is Mikey.

Nothing to do about that but wait. Both have to stay at the rescue shelter for thirty days.

Then there is the car. I have to take it into the Volvo place this morning and it is "not my job". There is nothing to it. I just go and leave it, take the shuttle home and then another shuttle ride back to pick it up.

It has ignition problems. It has not let me down yet but the little fits and starts are very nervous making. I do not like "nervous".

So I will take it in and let it go.

Only a mild displacement in a day that has no agenda in the first place.

Do I seem a little aimless? That is how it feels to me.

Labels: life

The Volvo is still acting up.

So I stayed home from a regular Meeting and called in to the service. I will take it in tomorrow morning. I have reserved a ride home from the dealer.

It burbles during the start process. There were some signs of this all the way back to my trip to San Diego. We figured it was something I was doing wrong with the switch or the brake or something. It did go away. But not forever. It is back.

It is not too troubling. I will take it one step at a time. I do know that it will work out. Just not according to my schedule but then that is most of life, isn't it?

Gotta learn to ride the waves.

Labels: repairs, Volvo

Being in a relationship with an addict should be an arms length kind of thing. If any length at all.

The relationship becomes toxic for all people involved. The lover gets sucked into a dance with the loved one who is on drugs.

But sometimes we are in relationships when the addiction happens. It is hard not to get stuck.

Today's film shows this endless loop.

Keep the Lights On (2012)

Without any warning Erik falls for a guy with a drug "problem" and soon finds that the "problem" is overwhelming.

I can attest to the validity of this film and the way things play out.

Ira Sachs says he has been there and it shows in the realistic presentation of how the disease only goes one way. Down hill.

The actors are nicely normal. Good looking. Good jobs. None of this matters. The bottom line is that one of the two is going under and the question is whether the other will get sucked down in the undertow.

Everyone means well here. They are intelligent and good looking. But the events unfold against their best efforts.

The drug here is crack cocaine. Vicious and uncompromising.

It is a hard film to watch. But as in all good dramas, there is a strong love and a gentle purpose behind it all.

This is part of our DVD collection and so it is a 5 out of Netflix5.

Not the most happy film for a time alone I admit. But there it is. I am working my way through the DVD collection.

Labels: films, gay films

John just called from Italy.

Syracusa. Syracuse. The boys from Syracuse.

He as Gwen are doing well and, from the sound of his voice, still into the proceedings. I would be flagging. It is a tour so he doesn't have to worry about driving and so on but still. 20 people, all crowded up. That is why I wouldn't be going on a trip like this.

But he is having a good time and that is a very good thing. It is his trip after all.

The phone calls are remarkably clear. I remember the old cable days. Static, delays, disconnections.

From the phone's viewpoint he might have been just around the corner.

Modern life.

I think that, in my time, one would get an overseas operator who would place the call for you and usually too busy to do it right away. They would call back when they had the connection. You would sit and wait next to your old style dial phone.

I am that old geezer who doles out "remember when" stories.

But I won't bore you. We had a good time on the phone and got what we mainly wanted. The sound of each other's voice.

Labels: Italy, vacation

We are sitting around waiting for El Nino again. With no real certainty, they look at patterns and talk in circles about it.

The reality is that we would not see much action from the disturbance until later in the winter. February.

That is always the bad month here.

I know that they say it will be disruptive continually through the winter but we have heard that before.

I guess we will just have to wait and see.

Labels: weather or not

Trouble with the Volvo again this morning.

Starting. It has trouble finding the "immobilizer" which engages if we don't press the brake pedal. Or something.

John took him in once and it was one of those things that they couldn't see, so, they didn't do anything. I will call today to see if I can get an appointment for tomorrow.

They don't know me. Well, our salesman Bob does. John is the guy who does most of this. I don't know if I will be able to get a loan car. I really don't need one I suppose. I can sit there and wait. We will see. It is not tomorrow yet.

Labels: automobiles, Volvo

Today's film plays out a kind of fairy tale about identity.

The prince becomes a commoner and no one knows he is a royal. He falls in love and finds himself caught between one world and another.

Such is the case with

Bad Boy Street (2012)

Claude finds Brad passed out in the street and takes him back to his flat. One thing leads to another.

Claude does not see American films and doesn't know that Brad is Aaron a film star in Paris making his new blockbuster.

And so on.

Yeh, it is a little cheesy.

But well played and fun to watch and the sex scenes are very nice. More R than X which is actually the best kind.

There are a lot of these films made for a niche audience and we go for all of them. It has to be a profitable niche. And I am grateful it is worth their while to grind them out. Essentially they are gay versions of timeless romantic drama or comedy.

A 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

There is a film genre that rests on relationships between a gay and straight man.

These vary as to outcome. Sometimes, the straight guy comes out to himself and ends at least bi-sexual. Sometimes a complete conversion. Other times the situation is more oriented toward love between two men that ends up in a non-sexual expression of some kind. This is the type of outcome of today's film.

Yong jiu ju liu / Permanent Residence (2009)

by the director known as Scud (Wan Cheung Lau).

I have seen this several times. All of the film is lyrically produced near the ocean, in luxurious apartments, Hong Kong. A romance between a gay and a non-gay man. There is love but its expression cannot be the same.

This is not only a major theme of gay films, it is a major theme of most gay men's lives.

We all get crushes on straight men. Sometimes more than a crush. Unrequited love.

You would think the straight guy would relax and have a go at it but that is seldom the case.

This is a wonderful film about such an "impossible" love. But the fact is that each man feels the power of their love and the lack of a sexual dimension is overcome as a barrier to a real union between them.

It is a definite 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

Bulletins from Italy indicate that John is having a good time with friend Gwen.

Today they are in Agrigento. Temples. I have some photos already.

Here, it is dark and rainy and much more like the old Boston weather than sunny Palm Springs.

You may recall that we welcome such weather as we have so little of it. No temples.

There is fog over the mountain and everything is quite soppy.

I will not need to water today.

I am enjoying my time alone. I am not sure how long that will last but so far so good.

We do spend a lot of time together. A break can be conducive. John got his turn a few weeks ago when I went to Boston, London and Toronto.

I am keeping about the same hours. Gym and a Meeting. Then the morning nap. The after lunch movie.

I might go out to eat tonight. The frozen entrees are a bit old after four days.

Otherwise, same same.

I will shop tomorrow and meet with a friend in the morning.

I guess it is fair game to show a picture from where they are. It is better than showing a rainy day photo in Palm Springs. Well, maybe not. Why not both!

Contrasts.

Labels: travel, weather

Today's movie is a sex and amphetamine story.

Not a good basis for an entertaining watch but, nevertheless, very satisfying.

One of four films by a director known as Scud. All break boundaries of one kind or another so that "gay" is incidental.

Amphetamine (2010)

A successful business man falls for a gay hustler who may not be gay at all.

The hustler has a very messy past and present. The use of amphetamine is just around the corner with his brother who deals.

When there is trouble in the relationship, the hustler smokes. There is no shading over the consequences.

The film is a tragedy. Not even a melodrama.

On top of this sadness is glorious cinematography. Beautiful bodies. Great fantasy sequences. Dreams.

There are four Scud films. I will see them all as they are next in line in the DVD book from whence I am re-playing these gay films.

A 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

We are activating our search for a new dog to join our family.

So far there is one positive sighting. An eight year old Aire-boy in Albuquerque NM. More than a one day drive away.

He is a handsome guy and lives in a kennel now. His human who is/was older got too sick to keep him.

We heard from him through our friend Rusty who has an airedale rescue operation with a few other people. Southwest Airedale Terrier Rescue (SWAT!).

He is just on the top side of our age range. Eight. But he is a handsome guy and so we are pursuing the next steps. Rusty is going to be in Albuquerque next week for her work and will go visit with him. I am thinking she might bring him back to her place in Las Vegas.

I don't know. We have not taken it that far.

But it is encouraging to know there are airedales out there. If Ace does not work out we will probably not hold out for another airedale much longer. We will go for another related breed like a welsh terrier who are half the size but marked just the same.

It is a hopeful sign though.

Just taking it a step at a time.

Labels: Airedale, dogs

It had to happen sooner or later.

We finally got the dread "monsoon" conditions for the weekend. A long weekend.

This is when the heat and humidity swirls the wrong way off the Gulf of Mexico and rolls into the desert delivering uncomfortable, stay inside weather. The air is thick and later there will be a lot of thunder and dry lightning.

I walked out at 4 AM and it was totally muggy. Without a cloud in the sky. Clear as a bell.

Later, this could all end in a torrent.

I know. This is just like summer back east. But we left all that behind.

I remember how boring it was to listen to John's mother Jeanne go on about the weather in Florida. And I try not to do that. But occasionally, it calls for comment.

After all, we came here for the weather as a major factor.

There was a funny article in the local paper. Palm Springs flash flood warning canceled, Araby floods. Predicting the weather here is as perilous as it was in Boston.

Labels: desert, weather

Two movies today.

Hey, I have a lot of time on my hands. Being alone and all.

The second one, Italian, was the wonderful if a bit raggedy

Spinnin' 2010

This is the one in which there are a hundred kisses, counted out one at a time.

Two gay men want a child together, sort of without knowing it.

Their many friends somehow manage to interact in a way that leads to, well that is the story, huh? No spoilers here.

The style of the film is a bit non-realistic but not magical. Everything is possible in real life. It is just that in this situation of "spinning" you never know when or where you will end up and at the end of the spin you are a little bit dizzy.

The men and women are handsome and there is nothing bad that happens at any time. The hand of Providence is good.

It is very enjoyable.

Technically, the film suffers from a look of having been made on the go. Perhaps shot at certain times. The post production work had to be minimal. Bluish turns to golden color and back again to very lifelike flesh tones. It is a little distracting but not enough to get in the way of a very happy experience. A 5 out of Netflix5. So good we bought it.

Labels: films, gay films

Today's movie takes place on a semi-industial farm.

Some of the work is mechanized but there is still a place for farm hands to do the detail and finishing chores.

In Germany, farm workers are put through an apprenticeship program to learn about both machine and labor aspects.

Two young men at the same farm meet and become friends in

Stadt Land Fluss* / Harvest (2011)

They begin to spend more time together, hanging out after work. Walks through the fields. Trips to the river to swim. They exchange some shy looks.

They find a car on the farm that seems abandoned but still works. It is a great place to relax on breaks and in idle time. They get in the car one night and try to start it. It runs! They drive it off the farm and just keep rolling. They end up in Berlin 60 K away. Bright lights, big city.

They walk around and then sleep in the car. One thing leads to another. They "bond" in the back seat.

Nothing new in the plot except these are farm kids. Rare to see a rural gay situation in films even though a lot of gay fantasies run to farm hands and such!

The visuals are all bucolic. Beautifully rendered. Dawn, animals, lots of water. The soundscape is full of farm sounds. Sprinklers, cows, machines.

I love this film. It is a 5 out of Netflix5.

I have seen it several times and each time find something new. It is still very satisfying emotionally. Young love. Sweetly rendered.

*As often happens the translation of the title is weird. In German it is "City Country River" which is descriptive of where the two young men are able to be together. Maybe more apt.

Labels: films, gay films

An ex comes back to town and disrupts the peacefulness of the land where he used to belong.

An eternal theme.

This time, the ex is gay and comes back from Spain for more than a hello.

He calls his ex and say's he is back. The boyfriend has a new partner. The reunion is fraught.

A kind of "all hell breaks loose" in a quiet but very upsetting way.

It is August (2012)

So it is hot and uncomfortable and every one is on edge anyway.

Raw nerves.

This is a very good movie about the past colliding with the present.

All the acting is great and the scenes of LA in summer are ongoing and wonderful to look at. Even the hot uncomfortable ones.

I have seen this before and it part of my retrospective of most of the gay films we have in our collection.

It is a 4 out of Netflix5. It is highly re-watchable because of the subtle interplay of the character's reactions. It is tough to work at appearing adult and civilized when your hormones are crying out to say nothing of the feeling of history coming back to submerge you.

Labels: films, gay films

I have been working on my new phone "settings".

I finally figured out how to set up the auto dial part of it today.

I put one in for John and then for my sponsor in the Program.

I was exhausted after doing it.

It is not that hard really but paying attention is exhausting.

I am not blessed with an abundance of patience and so this has been good for me.

In the same way that bad tasting medicine is said to be good for us.

I am sure I will appreciate it the next time I want to speed dial these two frequently called numbers but right now I am sick of the whole business.

Labels: phone

More from our hero in the courts, Judge Posner. He has written almost all the opinions allowing gay marriage and striking down the bans.

Here is what he said this time.

"Heterosexuals get drunk and pregnant, producing unwanted children; their reward is to be allowed to marry. Homosexual couples do not produce unwanted children; their reward is to be denied the right to marry. Go figure," Posner said.

Labels: gay marriage, marriage equality

I heard from John today.

He and friend Gwen are in their third day of touring.

That means they are in Palermo where they have been since they arrived Wednesday.

I have two pictures so far. A church and a bus ride.

Palermo is the center for several days touring.

In the meantime, I am doing pretty well. It is hard to set a new routine with elements of the routine being redundant or unnecessary.

I did go to the store this morning which is a regular thing for Friday. I will soon watch a movie as I do most days.

There is the internet to pay attention to.

And it is summer still so seasonal activities are still curtailed.

I talked to a neighbor this morning about the resumption of the normal business of the condo association. Board meetings are off for the summer but we are back with regular meetings September 20. Two weeks.

She is the head of the landscape committee. So far so good on the new company that is doing the daily work. Lawns, pruning, cleaning up and so on. The summer is a time of low level maintenance and soon the hard stuff will happen

In the meantime they are getting their rhythm down. Lawns need mowing, raking, blowing of leaves This is a big deal here, you should see it.

Back east the leaves fall where they may. Here they all get cleaned away on an almost daily basis.

It is funny how differently the two parts of the world react to nature. Here it is all freshening up all the time. There it was just a matter of keeping ahead of the next cycle of the seasons. We don't do seasons much here. Just primping.

Water, blow, cleanup, blow, rake, blow some more.

Paradise is hard to maintain.

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Labels: condo, landscaping, travel

I wasn't going to write about this but then it seems that I should.

Joan Rivers, a Comic Stiletto Quick to Skewer, Is Dead at 81

I laughed a lot at her but I also found her very annoying. Most comedians are, actually.

Insult humor is hard to do. Don Rickles is the king and Rivers would be the queen. The thing is, though, that she mostly told on herself. But the effect was that she was zinging others. Often unfairly.

I suppose this is because she had the instant mouth of a born hustler. Talk came easy right after the first thought. No impulse control. And of course that is a key to some comedians' success. Robin Williams comes to mind. Zero inhibitions and a quick wit.

Comedy is the toughest job I think. There is a documentary about her. I have seen it. She had thousands of "joke" cards and yet, she admitted, she rarely went in to look at them. But there they are.

I suspect that they are useless because they were all of the moment, the moment passed and they lost their zing. Now Rivers has passed. We only have the tapes.

Labels: comedy, obituary

The battle for gay marriage rights gained a lot of new ground this week.

Posner-ed at the 7th Circuit: Appellate Court Issues First Unanimous Marriage Equality Decision

The decision, written by famed Judge Richard Posner,covers a lot of ground.Even though the suit pertains to the States of Indiana and Wisconsin, it seems carefully written to negate many of the points raised in the anti-equality laws.

Our pair of cases is rich in detail but ultimately straight-forward to decide. The challenged laws discriminate against a minority defined by an immutable characteristic, and the only rationale that the states put forth with any conviction—that same-sex couples and their children don’t need marriage because same-sex couples can’t produce children, intended or unintended—is so full of holes that it cannot be taken seriously.

Labels: gay marriage, marriage equality

Today's film is a back-stager, a look inside the homo-porn film industry.

The title sounds sensational but the film is not.

Poco Più di un Anno Fa / Adored: Diary of a Porn Star.

Well, you know this is a disc only film. It is not likely to appear at your neighborhood theater. But maybe in Italy where it was made.

It is a nice story about a porn star who has it all or a lot of it. It is not sad. It is not moralistic. It is more realistic, I think.

There is an ambiguous ending which I will not reveal.

It seemed to me that this was a realistic and entertaining look at how a porn film is made and how the people in the business do their work.

Of course this requires a lot of scenes with naked men and rather realistic sex. A good thing from my viewpoint.

But it is not a porn film. Just about porn films.

I keep repeating this. The usual contradiction between "erotic" and stroke movies.

There is a strong central story with some romance and also the reunion of two brothers. One as straight as an arrow and failing at business as well as life. The other is the porn star.

The heart of the film is really about their relationship. Their father has died and the older serious brother comes to Rome to meet the estranged younger man who has a life and career well in place.

I have seen this at least once but probably more. It is a 5 out of Netflix5.

This is part of a series of gay DVDs that we own. These will be the films to watch while John is away. He won't miss any of the new Netflix films that we normally see together. And I will get to run through all the erotica again. A fair deal, I think.

Labels: films, gay films

With John gone it has been very quiet in the house.

Not that he makes a lot of noise. But he does have a sound. Sounds.

Yesterday the silence got pretty strong and I turned on the FM radio. KUSC. The LA classical station. The only classics we can get.

All music all the time.

And not a lot of talk although during the day some of the announcers think their job includes lame humor and comment. The music is a little more easy listening during the day as well.

I had forgotten how nice it is to have a sonic blanket.

I am in and out. I listen, then not and then something catches my ear and I am into it. I have even walked to the radio and stood there, rapt.

We do not have "stereo" anymore, incidentally. A sophisticated sound system like we used to have is now wasted on old men. Acuity has gone. I am not deaf but the wave lengths are attenuated. Besides, the big Bose radio player is very good indeed.

It is a lot like WCRB or WBUR in Boston. Not NPR which we do get but is too much of an ego fest for me. When did these assholes get on board?

Of course, WHDH in Boston had Robert J Lurtsema in the morning for decades. More arch you could not get. A lonely bachelor, now deceased, who took it out on his audience. A lonely mama's boy.

But that is long ago and far away. At least he kept it down to a low basso profound drone and sort of became part of the aural landscape. Here, not so much. Intrusion. Fucking jokes. But it is all we have here so I am grateful.

Labels: music, radio

The New York Irish establishment has relented.

They are going to allow "the gays" to march in the Annual St. Patrick's Day Parade.

Gay Groups to March in St. Patrick’s Day Parade as a Ban Falls

Basically, I don't give a shit one way or another but the annual scuffle over this has been a nasty slap in the face particularly to gay people who are members of the Catholic Church.

Oh. Yes, there are gay Irish. Quite a few in my experience.

Some people believe otherwise. I have actually met a few. Here and there. It is my impression that there are a lot of them.

For these people, personally it is a painful experience to be shunned by their own family. No matter how one braces for it, there is hurt. Deep hurt.

It is interesting how close the whole thing binds with the "Archbishopric" of New York. As that Cardinal goes, so goes the flock. So it is probably a bigger picture.

That is the funny thing to me. A bystander. When it comes to the Catholic Church the image frequently belies the actual practice. I have known so many gay priests! Amazing to me. They stay where they are, everyone knows, it is the open secret. Then as an institution they are homophobes. Self hatred.

One of the most flagrant high church homes was Cardinal Spellman. I think his drag name was "Franny". Hah.

This is the interesting part. The reverse effect of gay pride. The deeply closeted even unmarried queer who turns anti-gay so that no one will see his own nature.

For the regular folks, it is not so easy to doff one's heritage. Church is part of life for many. I had to deal with a mild case of guilt over my Methodist labeled sins. It used to be a liberal church. They turned somewhere in the 60s. They are still out there in bigotry land spouting their hateful shit.

Labels: bigotry, gay history, gay rights

So now it is ISIS.

Like mushrooms, poisonous ones, the muslim fundamentalists continue to sprout up.

I think that some of this stuff is cover for just crazy sociopaths who find fertile ground to connect with others like them. The fertile ground is the supremely fucked up middle east. They will come if you build it. And the Brits, Israel and its US friends have built it. A perfect incubator for acting out rage.

It is not without reason that they revolt and terrorize. We and our allies have made a fair fuckup of that part of the world.

Here is another take on the question of the fundamentalist.

Isis Is a Disgrace to True Fundamentalism

This guy is a Muslim fundamentalist. He is as appalled at the whole scene as I am.

His point is that these guys are not really serious about their religious beliefs. If they were they would realize that terror is not a tenet of Mohammed. They would be reined in by their daily spiritual practices.

And so on.

It is an interesting dilemma that we have not had to face here. Yes. There are nut cases who seize upon religion to do violence and perpetrate awful acts but not at this scale. They are quickly shown to be radical outliers or psychopaths. At least sociopaths. Almost all religions that I know of are built on the notion of restoring social order. Community. A body of belief.

The other factor here is political. Many of these people are stoked up by closet politicals who use the religious thing as a tool for manipulating support. Iran is full of these bastards.

Finally, there is the element of fundamentalist belief itself. A non-reductive adherence to literal readings of so called religious texts. The christians have this in abundance. The word of god in a paper book that has been so distorted and skewed around over the centuries that it really cannot be seriously considered as, even, literature.

Spoiler alert. I once took a course in the bible as literature in college and lasted two weeks. Sure, some Psalms and all that. But the rest? Tough going.

So I don't know. This all comes late in my life.

At the end of WWII we were not so naive as to believe that the world was "cleansed" of evil. In fact it had saturated itself in evil with the War.

For many years, world communism, was the enemy. A mask for the unfought battles and unresolved issues of the War. Superpowers. But then all that has fallen away and we are left with the new/old paradigms. Living breathing collections of people who have a grudge or a bent toward homicide mostly unleashed. At least with the Russkies we faced an organized threat that could be grappled with. That you could talk to.

Not here in the land of fundamentalism. They would all be at each other's throats the second the infidels were defeated. Eternal hatred.

Labels: christists, Middle east, muslims and arabs

We have put out the signals that we are looking for another dog.

Airedale, preferably, but I am hurting so from being dog-less I would take almost everything. Well, that is not true. But a Welsh Terrier or similar.

We had started out thinking that we would get a smaller dog to replace our beloved Booker. That doesn't seem so important now.

Particularly in the sudden appearance of an older Airedale, Ace! He is in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Is 8 years old and is a big boy. 90 pounds. Same thing.

It is my uninformed opinion that the days of the 45 pound airedale are over. A guy out here tried to breed hundred pounders and the genes got out. Booker was big. All of them seem big now. I did see a female at 40 recently. Already adopted. They go fast.

So, the wheels are in motion. As it happens, our friend Rusty is going to be in Albuquerque next week. Rusty is our trusted rescue dog expert. We got Booker through her.

So the process will unfold.

We could not get a better helper than Rusty.

It is happening. I knew it would. And just two days after John went off to Sicily for three weeks. Maybe we will have another trip for him to make when he gets back.

Labels: Airedale, Booker, dog

This is the funniest thing I have seen today.

Maybe this week.

Don't fuck with Mickey.

And they took his hat with them too.

Labels: fun

As in "a row", a fight or argument.

Does a Supreme Court Justice just say, "oops"?

This puts the savage practice of capital punishment in the limelight. A guy in North Carolina has been exonerated as a result of new evidence. The Supremes had turned his appeal down. I wish they would turn the death penalty out of existence. But they hang onto it, particularly the noisome Scalia (what an apt name, drips of evil, the kind of name that an author would love to use to denote villainy).

Scalia is an unrepentant deathist. He is at the forefront of the killers on the Court. We know he is also an arrogant asshole and the most detestable appointment to the Supremes in my lifetime.

It is the arrogance that grinds my ass more than anything.

I am just ranting here.

I have nothing to say about this bastard. Nothing good. And words cannot describe the wrongness of his sitting on this Bench.

A creep.

Labels: capital punishment, Supreme Court

A text from John to say that he had made it to Palermo. Sicily. Not Italy. I think they like to make the distinction.

This is the departure point for his fifth Italian tour. This time he is with our friend Gwen.

His flight was on time. I followed it across. Sort of pushing it with my fingers on the keys.

He will be there almost three weeks.

That means that I have an "arrival" too.

I arrived, this morning, at self sufficiency and aloneness.

A state that I relish almost as much as being part of a happy couple.

I can't explain that. If you know what I mean you get it. If not, OK.

Labels: travel

I watched the entire three hours of today's film. One sitting and I am still sitting to finish this.

Rabioso Sol, Rabioso Cielo / Raging Sun Raging Sky

I saw it before but in two sittings.

I am not sure whether the impact of the full monty is part of it but I did enjoy this film much more than I remembered.

This is the third and, so far, final film by Julian Hernandez that I have been watching.

This one is pretty much about a long, mostly unconsummated love affair between a hustler and a young guy who is fascinated with him. And it is a textbook on gay cruising and what it is like.

The film is long because Hernandez takes his time with nuance. Glances. Fine points. The cruise.

It never dragged for me and I only looked at the time once when I got worried about being somewhere else in time. I made it.

This is the kind of film that requires some attention. It is in black and white and it is unrepentantly arty.

But I like "arty" and it is very fulfilling when arty stuff works as it does in here.

The two male leads are beautiful to watch. There is a lot of sex in it. Very erotic and I don't think pornographic. I still am not sure of the difference but I think erotica is when the work is satisfying of itself, all the way through and does not support stroking it off. Little breaks, unsexy bits thrown in. It is an art in itself, erotica. The scenes were wonderful and there was not one moment that I took it as prurient. I love that word. Prurient.

Three hours is a long time though.

Sorry, I gotta go.

This is a 5 because it is the second time through and I bought the disc and it is the last of the Hernandez mini-fest.

Labels: films, gay films

While John is away in Italy I am going to be watching as many of our own gay DVDs as I can.

In the time allotted of course.

I had thought I would start at the top of the list and work my way down it but I have already broken that with the three films of Julián Hernández. I did this mostly because I got a new one the other day and then decided to put them all together.

I know this doesn't matter much to you but it does to me in a weird compulsive I-broke-my-contract-with-myself kind of way.

There is no telling how much the serious gay film scene has changed since I became a viewer.

By this, I mean a gay film which has a serious message and is entertaining in a gay way at the same time. A real film with all the full production values. Just like good movies have always been.

In the beginning there was David Hockney who knocked out an art film about his own work. Then others began to show up in the Boston art theater circuit. This is over a period of 40 years. A lot has happened.

Today, there are a lot of gay films that are far superior to Hollywood and even the independent market.

Time marches on.

Labels: films, vacation

Today's movie by Julian Hernandez is basically a silent film.

I counted four instances where there was dialogue.

Wow.

El Cielo dividido / Broken Sky (2013)

This is the same movie maker as yesterday and there will be a third film tomorrow.

This one is an obvious stretch for most people. There is no dialog. It is long. The length apparently substitutes for the cues missing in the usual talk.

Some reviewers complained about this. I do not.

I have seen it before and it was still very worth the time.

Two young men meet, have a relationship. One cools off, the other gives up after repeated attempts to get the fire going again. Then he leaves and finds someone else. Another guy who has been lurking around waiting to take over if the opportunity presents.

Then, things change. The two young men take another look at one another.

I will let the results be a surprise.

I liked it and it is an automatic 5 out of Netflix5 because I bought it and repeated it. With good results.

There is some beautiful and graphic love making in this. If that is your interest it is well worth your time. Everyone is a looker and the gyrations are very romantic. Not porny.

Labels: films, gay films

I just left John off at Enterprise car rental.

He is driving to LA where he is taking a flight to somewhere on his trip to Italy.

Jeez. I just looked. Palermo. One hop to Italy.

I haven't been paying attention. It is a long flight but he is the man for it.

We had a nice ride to the airport and I surprised myself by getting all emotional about it.

But we did not linger.

The best way to say goodbye is to say it and get the fuck out of the way.

It is our default. The only one that works.

There is a lot to say to each other but we have already said it and the rest of it is all heart language anyway.

I met him in 1975 or 1976. I still struggle with the date.

The first few years were a struggle. Both of us were newly out and thought we had to do more "work" to find a relationship with another man.

Not knowing we already had one.

Anyway, he is off. I am glad for it. I need some space.

That will probably wear off in a few days. But for now, I can do what I want whenever I want to and not worry about bothering anyone.

Of course, I already have that anyway. We haven't been in each other's way for so long it seems second nature.

Labels: marriage, travel

The pianist and composer Conrad Tao performs the third movement of Prokofiev’s Seventh Piano Sonata.

Labels: music

I belonged to a union when I was in my teens.

Teamsters. Retail Clerks Union International. Or something.

I was proud to be a member. That feeling has never left me.

This is the famous garment workers ad.

It gives me some goosebumps. I can't explain it.

Part of me.

Labels: unions.

On the face of it, there is not a lot going on in today's film.

But its beauty and eroticism provides a "feelings based" experience which is hard to relate.

I Am Happiness on Earth (2014)

from the director of two films I enjoyed: Julian Hernandez, with Broken Sky (2006) and Raging Sun Raging Sky (2009).

It is all about relationships and works like the French film La Ronde.

Two guys meet and then split off and form other connections with other men and then find their way back to one another. This is not telling you anything. Not a spoiler. I didn't say that when they find each other again that all the fireworks of the first meeting go off.

I liked this a lot. There is a lot of sex which is always nice. Sweet, loving sex. Not the poke it and let it go kind.

I went ahead and bought the film on other people's say so and I am happy that I did because I will definitely see this again. Perhaps in a small festival of Julian Hernandez films.

That makes it a 5 out of Netflix5.

Labels: films, gay films

I am an unrepentant cheerleader for my country, The United States of America.

I read and hear a lot of negative shit about us but that, of course, is one of our main features. The capacity for self criticism unhindered by law or social custom.

I am always happy to see this kind of list

Also proud to see that my alma mater is listed as the top college! I am still a representative for new applicants to the school.

Say what you will. The land of the free and the home of the brave rocks it.

Labels: United States of America

I had my genome tested again.

No matter what I do it doesn't come out different.

100% European Northern European 42.6% French & German 18.5% British & Irish 3.5% Scandinavian 21.8% Broadly Northern European Southern European 2.2% Italian 1.0% Balkan 4.3% Broadly Southern European 0.8% Eastern European

This surprises me some. I had always thought mostly German. But then I have to remember that the Germans over ran Europe many times and probably raped everyone in sight. When these victims were women, well, they had little part German babies. When they raped men, well, we don't know.

Somehow, a little Scandinavian crept into my genes. I am pleased with that. They don't say which part of Scandinavia but it isn't the blond and blue eyed part. Not that part from Germany either.

Some Britishers got over there on the continent and sowed some seed. To say nothing of the Italians and Balkans. Balkans? That means those countries that are always in trouble.

It is nice to know but useless on a day to day basis. I feel the German stereotype to the core. A little this-a, a little that-a, with the emphasis on the latta'!

You can do this too if you want.

23 and me

Labels: ancestry, genetics