esrosedotblog

DASSIN IN THE DARK

Todays film is RIFIFI (1955); it means 'rough stuff'.

It is a NYT1000Best Film. Very good; a caper film noir with some pretty original twists and turns; nail-biter-ending. I will rate it 4 out of 5 on the Netflix scale.

Dassin is a very interesting guy. He was born in Middletown, CT and was an early Hollywood success with the dark classics NAKED CITY and BRUTE FORCE. Blacklisted early in the witch-hunt days, he went to Paris and made this film. He knew it was his only chance to make a successful career in Europe. It won him Best Director at Cannes; he was on his way.

We have seen two other Dassin films so far: TOPKAPI and NEVER ON SUNDAY. The complete list of his work is at Jules Dassin. It would appear that he made all the dark stuff, discovered Melina Mercouri, and turned fun and light. He appeared in a lot of his films. He has a second lead in RIFIFI. He plays as an Italian, the better to hide his accent. Here he is holding Melina's hand in SUNDAY. I couldn't find a RIFIFI pic with him in it.

TALKIN' THE WALK

I got caught talkin' while walkin' the dog today. Guy was sitting in his pickup (a looker as it turned out). He caught us coming along his port side discussing the merits of plastic versus paper. At that moment, Franklin had a grocery bag as a trophy. The guy and I had a smile about it. His smile was beautiful. I don't know what mine was like. Franklin just gripped the bag a little tighter.

John says that I talk to Franklin all the time and I guess it is so. I talk to him all day in the house, but it really gets involved on our walks together. We spend an hour out there. It seems a shame not to discuss all the wonders we encounter. There are some standards: speculation about the whereabouts of bunnies; appreciation of a new, or old, landscape features; consideration of the speed of the walk and the happiness content of it all. We do not discuss abstractions but try to stay in the now.

Today, in addition to the merits of bags, we took a while working our way towards a prime bunny site; talkin' ourselves into quite a heightened state of bunny-psyche. It takes concentrated coaching to get the prowl-up to the target right; the set of the ears, the posture and demeanor. And that's just me! As the primary pouncer, Franklin has to have all senses honed for the possibility of a close encounter.

We had some onlookers for this one too. Once they knew what we were up to, they got into it; all ooohing and ahhhing about the possibilities of a bunny in the bush. Of course, by this time, any wild life was long gone; yet, that is not the point. It is the journey not the destination, after all.

I like the walk. I like the talk. A man and his dog.

BALLS!



I don't recognize the mathematical accident of year-change as an EVENT.

It is all contrived nonsense; premeditated fun; the phoniest of holidays.

I grew up on the drama of the Times Square ball drop; Ben Grauer and Guy Lombardo; black and white television. I have to admit there were a few years I stayed up for the 'fun' of watching thousands cheer. I think it was more the teevee than the event itself. Once I was over that, there was no comparable signpost other than the calendar.

Next week, the gym will be awash in people, new and returning, who got caught in the 'resolution' trap. They will pass through on their way to next year's resolve: unbuffed; deficient in cardio capacity; feeling guilty.

What kind of a holiday is it where celebration is self punishment?

'nuff said.

SEVEN

When we moved to the desert seven years ago, we had the 'worst' winter since. It was cold. It was rainy. Many people came out to visit the paradise we had found and saw near back-East. Of course, it was not that bad; but when you want to show off, and the weather is not cooperating, it feels a lot worse than it actually is.

Then, in our first Spring, we had our reward for all the punishment. The desert came into bloom. There were wondrous expanses of flowers all over the valley and in the high desert as well. Desert rats told us to get out and see it all because it 'only happens every seven years'.

They were right. We have not seen the flowers since. We have not had cold rainy winters either. We have lived through a long drought.

Now, we are having cold rainy weather. It has been seven years! The rats were right. It will be a glorious spring--carpets of flowers! I love cycles.

Did I didn't mention when our Spring begins? The show will start in mid February!

ALAN BATES

In 2001, the PS Film Festival honored Alan Bates with a retrospective showing of his best films. Many of them were shown at 8AM. As die-hard fans, we were on hand to see them and so was Alan Bates!.

It was thrilling to be in the same room and hear him laugh and react as though it was his first time seeing them. After each showing, he would say just a bit about his memory of the film and answer questions. He was very humble, accessible and generous with his time and attention.

There are 78 credits at his site on IMDb Alan Bates and all you need to know at this website: The Alan Bates Archive.

We just watched THE ENTERTAINER in which he made his film debut as Olivier's son; dashing!

He died today at age 69 after a long bout with cancer. He kept working until right near the end.

ICE

For the record, let it show that there was ice on our roof this morning, plogging up two or three water pipes for a brief period.

RESTORATIVE

This cold has really kicked my ass on the energy front. None of the symptoms have been too bad once I got the meds in. The major feature has been the fatigue.

I wonder: is it the bug that has me lying down or is it my own willingness to surrender?

Now, in the past, I have been a trouper; go ahead with life and put up with the symptoms; don't give in.

This time, I took a few hints from my other half; considered that it was a bit of a holiday; took advantage of the fact that nothing else was really going on; and went to bed whenever I could get there. I have been on the rack as much as 12 hours a day!

I gave up the gym, did not go to the store, skipped a Meeting, asked John to walk the dog this afternoon, and will not do the Sunday bike tour tomorrow.

It seems to have worked. I am feeling a lot better (in less than seven days!) and I haven't had to fake it all the time when I'm with other people. Wasn't THAT an energy drain?

Randy was our guest for a few days and he and John have been very sweet.

The new UTNE Magazine has a cover on the POWER OF REST. Hmmmm. Live and learn. Eventually.

ICU

We have just completed a half an our on iChatAV video with the back east family; ten adults, six children there--two men and a dog here.

It is a great invention! Dave took his machine to the family party at Sara's and so we got a sitdown with every person. It is way more than phone; less than being there; of course.

This is the second time we have done the teevee with the whole bunch. Everyone is learning how to do it without mugging or shutting down. The trick is to be 'normal' and not overly long at it. Light. Very nice.

CRIMINALS

The new Medicare drug 'benefit' has rightly roused more people than it has satisfied. When the haves start to think about the have-nots; they do not realize that they have a warped perspective. Being patronized will almost always stir the populace.

We live in the midst of a huge retirement community and while we are part of the retired community; we do not have many of the same issues that most 65+ people have. We can afford a good Medicare supplemental policy and we do not use all that many drugs. We are lucky. Many people have been fighting this losing financial battle for adequate drug coverage for a long time.

Beyond the Medicare issue is the matter of 'illegal offshore' drugs. We live in an area where many many people travel to Mexico (illegally) to get drugs and medical care for far less than they can here. This has always been done with a wink and a nod at the border.

This has been going on for years. The infrastructure is well established. This is not a fly-by-night deal. Many of the Mexican companies are US run.

As the grip of the drug companies tightens, this everyday activity has suddenly become frought and more attention at the border has a lot of people scared. The business about Canadian drugs is really just a small part of it. The entire southern border is lined with alternative lower cost medicine for US Citizens who can drive across to get it.

I just got this email chainletter from a friend:

Subject: drugs
A car company can move its factories to Mexico and claim it's a free market.

A toy company can outsource to a Chinese subcontractor and claim it's a free market.

A major bank can incorporate in Bermuda to avoid taxes and claim it's a free market.

We can buy HP Printers made in Mexico. We can buy shirts made in Bangladesh.

We can purchase almost anything we want from many different countries BUT, heaven help the elderly who dare to buy their prescription drugs from a Canadian (Or Mexico) pharmacy. That's called un-American!

And you think the pharmaceutical companies don't have a powerful lobby? Think again!

(Please forward this to every person you know over age 50)

Notice that this is not about getting better aid from Uncle. It is about letting the market work; not paying sky-high prices to the money grabbers.

Yeh, I am leery about going over the border for any medical care but a lot of people are not and have nothing but good reports of it.

Look out. When the seniors start up a resurrection, the pols ought to be concerned. There are more of us and more coming.

I told him to take a look at Howard Dean. Both parties, the Congress, and the Executive have sold their soul to checkbook politics. Reform starts in the ballot box.

DAY OFF

Convalescing. Skipped the gym and the food store. Slight temp. Sleepin' a lot. I did get out to walk the dog--it was a beautiful day. Cold for here--in the fifties! I wore the parka. Taking my meds. The Robitussin broke the thing all to hell; so I am mostly just low energy--gloppy. Playing with the dog. Reading. John and Randy went out and cruised the consignment shops. Gotta get his new condo well furnished! PS is famous for its consigment shops--all those castoffs from the too well-to-do with nothing to do but redo.

RAPT

It turns out that our Franklin is a Type B un-wrapper. He takes the package and explores it. Then, making a decision about the first incision, he carefully removes a layer of wrap and takes a look at what is inside. Then, again, with a very judicious air, he removes more paper and as the gift emerges, he works methodically to get it out of its cocoon.

When the toy is disengaged from the wraps, and only then, he takes it and goes beserk playing with it; running, jumping, throwing it into the air, and growling vigorously at it. He took one present at a time from the stocking. We Type A package rippers could take a lesson from this methodical approach. The whole process took over an hour.....rapture rationed.

One item, a very large ball, was on the floor, unwrapped this morning when he got up. While he smelled at it and went to visit it from time to time, he got that it was not 'time' yet. He is one surprise after another.

MEDS

In my battle against the virus which is attacking me, I have escalated the meds to include expectorant (sorry it sounds icky) and cough suppressant. It has all settled in my upper chest and there is a slight fever this afternoon. So, I want to get the "skeezix" out of there.

An interesting side show: a trip to RITE-AID on Christmas Day! RITE-AID is a great place; a crossroads; open 24 hours! The place was mobbed. As far as I could see, almost everyone was doing last minuteChristmas shopping!(literally last minute as it was 3pm).

RITE AID is distinguished by the fact that, when you call them, the default voice-mail answering language is Mexican. You have to punch "1" to get English. Somehow, this is very pleasing to me.

KEPT

OK. OK. We will keep the tree up another day.

I remember that this was always a big issue when I was a kid. For years, the parents decorated the tree the night before Christmas. Other kids had their trees for a week before and then all the way through New Years' Day. I do not know when they made the switch; but once it was done it was forever. A proper tree goes up soon and stays long. This one is just two days though.

We had a good day. We got a lot of phone calls. We had fruit stollen that Randy brought; a holiday tradition. I had one piece and somehow it is all gone. They made off with it.

Later turkey...I roasted a breast a week or two ago and have been saving the results in the freezer;bread dressing--or stuffing if you prefer. The whole purpose of turkey is to justify the dressing; my patented cranberry sauce home made in the micro with fake sweetener.

John and Randy went to see COLD MOUNTAIN. I will abstain. I lived in Petersburg, VA when I was in the Army and I visited the Crater. That was enough. While Jude Law is very good looking, I have no desire to see him drag and suffer throughout for an eventual mating with Nicole Kidman. This is one of those films where I figure I know it all without seeing it. I am a bit snotty about this; but they do not like THE LORD OF THE RINGS; so there! Take that.

EVE

OK. So here we are. It is the EVE! 5:30 PM. Randy is on the 60; getting here nearly on time if there are no accidents. Bob is probably sitting at home waiting for a good time to leave to be here at 6.

The pork roast is done; the green beans are nicely toasted around the edges (oven fries);and the oven roast potatoes are in the oven now (one just sort exploded). John has his annual bush de noel ready to go.

So, now we can trim the tree.

And if I did it right,it will blink on and off for you.

[PS: Everything worked out fine. Randy got here in time, Bob was right on the dot, the food was great and the overly calori-shus bush (log) went fine.]

HUNG

The hardest thing to do in this house is to crinkle any paper or plastic wrap without having an immediate Airedale experience.

Tonight's challenge was packing Franklin's stocking. Randy and I went out to the spa and took F along. Somehow, our timing got off. John didn't get the stocking job done before we got back in. So we had him go outside again.

To aggravate the situation, the toys we got in PetSmart (right before his eyes) have been hidden in a totally non-dog oriented location. Yesterday, thinking he would not know what the bag contained, I got it out.

He did not forget. The manufacturers and stores pump this smell into the stuff they sell and it promises ambrosia.

The stocking was NOT hung on the chimney with care but put back in the non-dog oriented location for quarantine until the morning.

THE EYES HAVE IT

We have been wondering whether Franklin's eyes see the same things that we do.

After wondering aloud for a very long time I did some research which indicates that the answer is yes and no. Such is the result of a lot of research. Nothing definitive.

But there is a lot to know about dog vision, nonetheless. Yes, he sees the same stuff without distortion but he sees it differently: he does not see much of the red spectrum (but he is not color blind, as commonly believed); he sees wide-screen--way over 180 degrees (not all dogs do, it has to do with the length of the nose); he sees much better in the dark (more rods); and he can detect movement faster than we can(his flicker is quicker).

All this at various sites.
Dogs are streakers; Dogs are not, well, red; Doggy nights; and even MORE than you wanted to know about dog eyes

This should all explain why, when we tell Franklin to look at something, he usually does not seem to 'LOOK!'. He has already seen it; unless it is pure red of course, then we are performing a service for him.

GET OUT YOUR HANDKERCHIEFS

I started with the 'skeezix' yesterday--sore throat--humpy cough--that ache-all-over thing: the flu? SARS? throat cancer after all the smoking years? No. Probably just the onset of a good head-cold; all that suppressed holiday stuff has to pop out somewhere. I have no fever; actually subnormal temp. OK. That does it with the speculation as to diagnosis and cause. Let's get it fixed!

Get out the echinacea and zinc lozenges. These are clinically proven aids to getting relief--really! I read it in MensHealth Magazine--that reknowned medical journal. They don't kill the virus of course; just up your resistance. In any case it will keep me busy. If I take the meds, my cold will be over in seven days. If I do not take them my cold will last an entire week!

Oh and I will not stint on the aspirin.

DESPONDENT DEMOCRATS

David Brooks take on the Dean insurgency in the NYTimes today: The Great Surrender

He updates us on the angst-driven Demos and the late and sorta sad effort by Lieberman to fight Dean; rather than look at how the Party can capitalize on his momentum.

Like I said, the Democratic Party needs this kick in the ass.

BIRTHDAY BOY

John is 65 today. I put five of the candles on this cake. He will get the other 60 during the day.

It is a lifelong sorrow to have your birthday in the same week as J.C.; hard to get any attention. John still claims that even I forgot his special day one year; but this is only to underline the point. It is not based on fact.

We have been together for 28 of these very special days. I am looking forward to the year that our Anniversary years are greater than half his birth years. That would be ten years from now.

Then we will be working toward---no I guess we will never hit the same number.

Happy Birthday John.

TODAY'S MOVIE: STARGATE (1994)

Popcorn; but diverting popcorn. James Spader, Kurt Russell honcho through convention and cliché to defeat Jaye Davidson (the CRYING GAME trannie who never made another film after this). It is hopeless to outline the plot. Roger Ebert hated it.

We had a good time watching it unfold and provided our own over-dub to the action. Actually, the film does click along and, if you do not ask any questions whatsoever, it is a pretty good ride.

Q: Why did you order and then watch this. A: Because our Kurt is in it. This is not a good basis for selection, actually, as Kurt's films are generally quite unreliable; some are really good and then--uhhhh--well. This might be his career lowpoint; he has little to do, does it rather mechanically, and has a bad haircut. I am not even going to put his picture on this item.

I give it a 2 out of 5 as a recommendation and a 4 if you have our comments simulcast.

DON'T HOLD BACK

I am on the lookout for any and all stories about people around my age who are still going hard at life. See a nice article in the NYTimes:
Can't Stop Dancing to the Music of Life

This guy, Dudley Williams, is 65 and still dances with Alvin Ailey. He is their oldest dancer and perhaps the oldest dancer. This sure says something about the value of keeping up with my cardio! I do not regret giving up my work-'dancing'--the music had gone away--but I sure want to emulate his dance of life.

'"I feel that God has given me a gift,' he said. 'And if you don't use it, shame on you.' Despite expectations, Mr. Williams said his stamina and skills were undiminished. His slight body — 5 foot 8 and 130 pounds — continues to cooperate. 'I don't hold back,' he said."

TODAYS MOVIE: THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE KING RETURNS (2003)

The final act. It is the best.

The ring is returned, the evil-doers get their due, Viggo becomes King, and the Hobbits return to the Shire. No surprises there.

But it is the journey that counts; not the destination! And the journey in this LORDS is great. There are even some surprises. It is very emotional--or I was very emotional--throughout. There is a very real spiritual or psychological bond with the characters that transcends the material.

I expected a wonderful and unforgettable experience. I had the former and the latter will have to be realized over time; but, I am rather confident it will stay with me.

Now, how many times in one's life can that be said?

A five out of five.

STANDING O

This one is about ten years too late. The Tyranny of the Standing Ovation started in Boston. I remember the event very well.

There was a snow storm and people were getting up at the end of the concert to rush for their cars. Somehow, the artist (I think that it may have been Leontyne Price--the diva über alles), took the mass exodus as a standing ovation and with one magnificent gesture, swept the crowd into her stagey-embrace. Enthralled, the crowd stood one moment too long and was caught in an unbreakable cycle of clap/bow/clap/bow.

A side bar: in Russia, the artists will not leave the stage until the applause STOPS! So be careful, if you are watching some Russky imports. If you keep applauding, you may be headed for the Guiness Book of World Records.

John and I sat rooted to our seats for years; doing our part for perspective. Eventually, the roar of the greasepoint and the smell of the crowd took over, and we started to stand too. Now, I see that, as usual, New York has finally caught up with Boston.

Out here, they are so grateful for even the most disgraceful performance, that they stand before the concert is over; after a song or two, during the scripted encore, occasionally after just a movement. Oh well.

ON THE AGENDA

I suppose that by this time I should be used to it. For years we had to listen to news of the 'gay agenda'. I kept asking my friends, to no avail, why I had not gotten a copy of it.

Now, we are apparently at the forefront of America's consciousness around the issue of marriage. (Don't 'they' have anything else to think about?)

In today's New York Times, there is an article about the increasing support for a ban on gay marriage and decreasing support for gay relationships in general. You can take a look at this at Ban Support.

I have been essentially married to a man for 27 years. I am not about to look to the State or the Feds to endorse this union of equals. And, I certainly am not about to terminate the arrangements just because some twiddling law (or Ammendment) says that we are illegal. Hell, we have been illegal in as many as 27 States during most of those 27 years. There are now only a handful of States in which this is the case.

It is all so amusing to see the 'sky is falling' people look after other people's morals.

But there is nothing new in this. It is so much easier to meddle with other people's lives than take responsibility for your own. In this case, they are messing with the homos; but the MORAL AGENDA reaches into the lives of all their fellows; and believe me they all got a copy of it. This is just the first step towards the big roundup.

Oh, and another thing. We are now certified domestic partners in the State of California (the new law). I gotta also say that I have not noticed any new results forthcoming. For example, where are the cards and wedding presents?

Of course, as the article states, we don't really get to reap all the benefits of the new law until 2005. We will be sending out invitations.

MOVIE OF THE DAY: BIG (1983)

This is a real heart tugger; funny, sad, wise. It makes a great holiday film.

This is Tom Hanks just after he transforms from 13 year old Josh Baskins to BIG Josh. He is about to have some wonderful adventures and at the end of them, he will want to be back in his boy body again.

In a way, this picture is a metaphor for Tom Hanks career. He got BIG and became TOM HANKS. Inside the institutional Hanks is a young energetic actor who convinced you that what you were seeing was the real thing. After BIG, Hanks had about ten more years before he sort of ossified. SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE is about the limit of his charm for me. I quit going to see him after that.

Elizabeth Perkins has the unenviable job of convincing us that she is in love with a big child and she pulls it off. She has worked about as much as Hanks since then; but with a lot less attention paid to her; and I am sure, less money.

We also see Robert Loggia in a smallish but important part as big Josh' boss. You can still see the boy inside Loggia. He didn't lose it in his long career. He has 108 productions (film and tv) listed in IMDb and is still working at 73. I still love to watch him.

This is not one of the NYT 1000 Best/20thC but we gave it a 4 out of 5 on the Netflix rating chart.

SIGN OF THE TIMES

The New York Times discovered Palm Springs today. Take a look at
36 hours : Palm Springs. The article is pretty good; if a little too twee here and there; a bit above the masses, don't you know?

They don't tell you about the great tour of the windfarm north of town or the walking tour through the San Andreas fault or any of the 100 miles of hiking trails; but I guess with only 36 hours...............gotta get that martini and the massage and pig up to the food too.

I have told you this before: to use the NYT site, you must register; but it is easy to do and you should be registered at the Times anyway.

TENDING THE GARDEN

The day started with one of those achingly beautiful pink and purple sunrises we get this time of year--the angle of the sun or something. After the gym (legs) and breakfast I did the six-week fertilizing of roses and other flowery areas. Stuff will go dormant soon as the sun reaches its lowest point, so the food is really for their wake up time.

The roses are doing really well, so I may not winter-prune them back this year. I did a pretty good job in September when the summer ended (remove the dead branches, lop off any that cross over the wrong way and cut back to the height you want them to grow from). We do not do a severe prune here; although, every few years, it is a good idea to do so; gives them a fresh start and some incentive to build strong stems. Roses here will get leggy with all the sun if you let them spread too long.

The citrus are ready to come off now. We have been using grapefruit since November but it has been a bit sour until the last week or so. We will take fruit off until May or June when most of the remains will be stripped to make room for blossoms. Lemons are still plentiful. The limes are done. Both lemon and lime are potted so two crops a year are possible.

Tangerines are ready now and will make nice Christmas presents for people. The crop is less this year, I think, because they need to cross pollinate and there are not enough neighbors around--the tree has to depend on the wind to get fertile!

The only plants ailing are the winter flowers we put in a month ago (pansies and impatiens plus some other things that are mystery guests). It has been too cool for them and the carob tree is shading a bit more than usual. I skipped a pruning of the big tree and now will pay the price. Too much shade on the garden. Consequences in all actions!

TODAY'S FILM: RISKY BUSINESS (1983)


This is one of the last films with Cruise before he became a STAR and subsequently an INSTITUTION and, hence, almost unwatchable. He is impossibly young--17 in the role, 21 in real life. He is very good; and the air-guitar-in-underwear scene lasts for a lot less time than we remembered. You can see why he got the next picture.

It is one of the NYTimes 1000 Best/20thC. John walked out after the first third. You have to suspend your disbelief to hang. I managed all the way to the end.

Rebecca De Mornay is great and the young and very thin Joe Pantoliano (right-not thin) begins his career as a hovering menace.

I gave it a 3 on the Netflix scale (1-5).

// posted by esrose @ 4:30 PM (0) comments

TODAYS MOVIE:BEING THERE (1979)

Peter Sellers in a totally original production of an old plot chestnut. I believe that there are only 13 plots in 95% of the pictures we see. This is Plot# 12: (a)idiot becomes expert or (b) others turn idiot into expert through their own naiveté. This is 12b.

On the other hand, since we do not know where Chance comes from and, in the end, do not know where he is going (or understand the way he is going--can't tip the ending off) maybe it is not a standard plot at all and this guy really is--well not an idiot.

Sellers is excellent as the no-affect Chance. He is allowed very little or no 'business' and still makes it work. One of the best things about the film is Melvyn Douglas in one of his last roles (left). Shirley MacLaine is Shirley MacLaine. As usual, half her stuff is good and the other half over the top. I should mention the other main character is Television. It's unremittant and everpresent and there are some really wonderful parallel takes between the live action and the teevee background. (Are unremittant and everpresent the same thing)?

It is great to watch. A lot of it takes place at The Biltmore in Asheville, NC. John and I spent a wonderful day running around the estate during a long Appalachia drive a number of years ago. There was no medical equipment around at the time.

It is one of the NYTimes 1000 Best Pictures of the 20th Century. We gave it a 3 out of 5 on the Netflix scale because it is too long and a little too fond of itself, like Shirley.

// posted by esrose @ 5:27 PM (0) comments

OTHER BLOGS:

I have been interested in blogs for awhile and I have been inspired by this one for almost one year :

SAMUEL PEPYS DIARY

It was written about 340 years ago and I have been reading it, an entry at a time, since last January. There is no magic time to start; but it would be fun, if you are interested, to start with Sam on January 1st of 2004.

The site is heavily cross referenced and I have a recent book Samuel Pepys: The Unequalled Self by Claire Tomalin; a wonderful biography, to fill in the missing parts. I do not allow myself to read Tomalin ahead of the Diary's action.

Of course, Sam did not know that he was among the first bloggers. There were many diarists of this time and earlier; but none of these demonstrated the uniquely open personal quality of Pepys' work.

Tomalin says "Other diaries of the seventeenth century were devoted to the spiritual life, to politics or to accounts of travel and sightseeing, and even those that do give some details of domestic life are discreet [about detail]." "What is extraordinary is that [Pepys] went into areas no one else considered recording, looked at himself with as much curiosity as he looked at the exterior world, weighing himself and the world equally in the balance."

Now this is a 'blog'; a good model to follow.

Oh, incidentally: if you decide to read the entries day by day, the Diary covers eleven years of Sam's life as, coincidentally, it will cover yours.

I will be 77 when I am done.

The Pepy's site and its readers are committed to the entire project. You could buy the Diary in book form but I am told that it takes a four foot hunk of shelf.

// posted by esrose @ 9:05 AM (0) comments

QUESTIONS OF ACCURACY

It is amusing to watch the other Demo candidates scrutinize Howard Dean for being inconsistent in his views of the Iraq debacle when they had no position or waffled or even caved to the Bush distortions and blatant fabrications ramping up to the war.
They are obviously hoping to capitalize on the small drop in the Dean vs. Bush trial run poll numbers just published. Dean is still the best against Bush.....all the others dropped MORE in their versus Bush numbers.

This makes them near Republicans I would say. Actually, in the absence of any real position of their own, it makes them neuters. We have two clear and articulate visions in the political arena today: the Bush Administration and the Dean Campaign. All the other guys have their backs turned looking the other way.

Dean says that these attacks by his fellows have "'taught me a new persective on human nature'(sardonic smile)" (Today's LA Times).

I have been drifting toward Dean but now I guess I am there. There IS no other credible Demo candidate and he may have the stuff; unless candor and courage to speak one's mind--as well as to have a mind and change it in the face of new evidence--are old hat and not needed in the Republic today.

See more about this at Howard Dean for America
The lead item on this site today includes the letter to the other candidates managers who supported the ad (now pulled) linking Dean with Osama Ben Laden! Stooped too low.

// posted by esrose @ 7:27 AM (0) comments

SIGN THIS:

"When Sir Ian McKellen was lobbying then Home Secretary Michael Howard about the controversial Section 28, which forbids the promotion of homosexuality in schools, Mr. Howard asked for the actor's autograph for his children. With a smile on his face, but with his lobbying having failed, McKellen says he wrote: 'Fuck off, I'm gay.'"
-- BBC News, Nov. 14.

// posted by esrose @ 4:43 AM (0) comments

TSUNAMI:

I am enjoying watching the waves of the holiday pretty well; wading along here on the strand; gettin' my feet wet; but, with an eye to the horizon in case the BIG one comes by.

I have become a minimalist as far as the season is concerned. I enjoy some of the atmospherics that others create--the lights, the wreaths, and so on; but try not to get caught up in it myself. I certainly did my share over the years, but now, I like to get up on the beach and watch the ocean rather than get into it.

An occasional body surf is good too.

I am in-charge of the holiday cards more or less and I do get into it. I get them out shortly after Thanksgiving and work the list. There is a system to it of course: the computerized record of last year's S and/or R (send/recieve); the decision to keep 'delinquents' on the list or not; who is new or off that needs to be on--some people go off the list and then through happy circumstance go back on as a result of their good behavior. Certain policies emerge ('no local cards') and so on. It has just the enough bite of a management problem to it which I like.

I do not get all sappy about it but I do write simple notes. We no longer do newsletters as being on the recieving end of them has highlighted all their faults; learning through others' experience!

I DO the cards because I like to GET others' cards and the results of my labors last for weeks through the ramp up to the big days themselves. Every day there is a little reward in the mailbox. I do ask John every year why we are doing this since we never see or talk or write to these people all year long. But that, of course, is the point. We are not in contact in any other way and because we are in contact THIS way we still are 'holding hands' and that feels good to me. And, others write little notes and I endure, and even grudgingly enjoy, the newsletters.

That is it. I watch John decorate. He is getting to be a minimalist too.

One of the traditional decorations is a little advent calendar with boxes to open each day. Little wooden presents are in each box. You take one out, a day at a time, and hang it on the tree: little houses, candy canes, teddy bears, stockings and so on. On the 25th day, there is a star to put on top of the tree. This year, I have the odd days and John has the evens. That means I will get the star at the end.

I will cook some holiday food, and I will probably do something else spontaneously if I feel like it; but, I do not PLAN MY FUN.

Randy is coming over from Long Beach for the Long weekend and Bob L. will join us for a simple dinner on the 24th.

We will talk to the family back east; mostly the grandchildren.

We may all take a long bike ride the 25th morning; the gym is closed--the one time in the year it is as it is a 24/7 gym.

I will go see LORD OF THE RINGS: Return of the King! Neither John or Randy are RING-ers.

I will be nicely buzzed.

And I will keep my eye on the horizon. Somewhere out there, is a big sloppy, all churned-up tsunami of holiday crazies ready to come in and swamp the shore. Lord knows I have been hit with this wave enough in the past to keep a weather eye.

Keeping it simple.

// posted by esrose @ 3:36 AM (0) comments

PUSHIN' THE RIVER

It has been a great day.

I was up a bit early (245AM-the usual is 300 and max is 315); did the pup thing--pee, poop, play and eat. Meditation was good. I got through my news fix--the NYTimes email headlines and a dip into Yahoo News; checked the email; downloaded the crossword; looked at the market futures and was at the gym earlier than normal. This was the day for long cardio (an hour on the elliptical) and abwork.

I got home for more pup-play and boyfriend-friending and got the LATimes read over breakfast and after, some work on the e-mails. I even got finished with my 'daily' file on the 'net from the weather through the Drudge report, on to the earthquake record and so on. Then off to a Meeting which was nice with side visits to some of my buddies there.

Got home. Read some Dragons of Pern and, by the time lunch time rolled around I was ready for it and the post-lunch nap (how else do you think I can get up at 3AM everyday?).

CAUTION: Introspection ahead/ slippery when wet

Now this is good. So far it looks easy going. Actually, now that I see I type it, it does not look like easy going at all.......it looks like full tilt bizzyness.

AND underneath it all was a gnawing feeling that this was not enough; that I was lagging behind. I was not getting things DONE. It was too quiet.

Someone at the Meeting, Bob P., had idly pointed out to me that I sure had a lot happen in the last week. I demurred and said 'Aw it was nothing', but the comment stuck with me.

After all, I did do two days of kinda hard-time on jury duty on Monday and Tuesday, took delivery of a new car on Wednesday, used the next couple of days to play catchup, then went off to Pamona for the Cirque on Sunday.

This is all to say nothing of the fact that Franklin turned one year old on the same day! And then his party on Monday at Petsmart (see below). Wow, how much pressure is there in that?

Around all this, I got all strident-like on Monday about the Saddam thing; conflicted. I got all up in arms about the Demo-primary-circus and the mistreatment of my man Dean by his shiftless, spineless opponents.

The same day, I also got in high dudgeon--that is on top of strident-- and fired off a longish 'letter to the editor' rant to Andrew Sullivan, my conservative buddy. (Andrew always gets me stirred up as I am totally ambivalent about him--a gay conservative--you can get a sample any day at THE DAILY DISH. I think that you will see what I mean. Try to get out of the site unscathed and at ease. He is stirring.

Hell, that is MORE than a week.

Tuesday was quiet. Take a look. I did the standard things but relaxed into the day. I figured a day off was enough.

And so this morning, as I took in the suggestion about having had a lot of stuff on my plate for the last week, I understood it but it didn't really sink in until I found myself struggling this afternoon. I was trying to get a web-site started on Earthlink--a place to put photos that I could link into this blog.

Things went from bad to worse; so, not satisfied with taking it easy or backing off, I forged ahead. I took on a bit of nasty sledding. It was not working for me but I kept going. 'It' got even worse. The web froze up.

I have a LOT of trouble with 'assistants' and 'wizards' that help me set things up and this one was particularly vexatious. It is the third site that I have started to start without any success. My name is on three empty boxes out there in never-never-net-land. Who says I have trouble asking for help?

In the middle of my struggle; as my teeth began to grind and my head was bopping, Bob S. called to talk about working for his big one-man show in February. As he talked about keeping at moderate stress for max-productivity in his painting, he got, and I felt, my inattentiveness to what he was saying. Me me me me.

When he asked if 'this is a good time', I copped to being 'out of it'; 'stressed to the top' on the photo upload thing. He identified. The same happens with him. Not doing 'enough'; compensating by pushing it; getting all tied up. Then, the work doesn't work.

He told me to stop. Take the dog for a walk. And so on. Go with the flow. If it is not working: Stop. He told me that a couple of times. Each time it sunk in a little more. And here I thought he called me to help HIM with something. Maybe he did. Maybe I did.

I stopped.

I got Franklin out of his little mini-nap and hit the road. He was just waiting for me to get out of my box and get it on with him anyway. Semper Fidelis Franklinius.

It was warmer and prettier than yesterday. We had a good time. Somewhere in the middle of it I realized that it was OK to take it easy this week. I really DO need a little recovery time.

Somewhere in the last third of the walk, I got that I don't give a shit about putting pictures on this site. What an 'insite'. I thought I wanted them in here; but I don't. In fact, if you look at the very first inarticulate posting on the blog, I say that overdoing it was what got me overdosed on the website that I had doing a couple of years ago.

Here I go again. Almost.

What is kind of amazing is that, intellectually I know all about this kind of thing--power driving--over reaching myself--compulsive achieving. I also know my own versions of it as they have been with me throughout my life.

But when the stuff comes on, it is not recognizable as, well STUFF. It seems imperative that I fix whatever it is that is going 'wrong' immediately (when it is ME that is on the blink). Of course, being powerless over people, places, things, and a lot of my own 'business' as well; FIXING it OR myself is the last thing I should be doing. Time to let it goooooooooooooo.

Go walking with the dog. Quit pushing the river.

Ahhhhhhhhh, breathe. Easy does it. Another lesson in the same old 'textbook'.

// posted by esrose @ 3:15 PM (0) comments

COOL HEAT

Today is one of those wonderful desert days that are cool AND hot. The temps are in the mid 60s and chilly but if you are in the sun I am hot because of the radiant heat--there is very little humidity in the air to block it out.

This sensation of cool heat is delicious especially on a walk through the neighborhoods with your dog--cool/hot/cool/hot as I pass through tree shadow and back into the sun. Winter flowers are beginning to throb with color; the newly seeded rye grass is very very green; and the light sparkles.

The rising wall that leads to the high desert (Mojave) 3000 feet above our low desert (Sonora); twenty miles away, appears as though it was within an arms reach--so clear.

The afternoon hour-long walk seems very short. It is shirtsleeve weather with a bite.

SUBDUED

No rants and raves today about world affairs. It all seems sort of muted and subdued somehow in view of the weather and the fact that there is not a whole lot to be done about 'things' today.

I am back to the gym this week after the layoff and have the usual aches and soreness here and there. This is a good thing. It would be a shame to be doing the work and not getting any results. All those little torn muscle fibers are working to repair themselves and will make a slightly bigger stronger bulge when the get finished healing. The layoff is having the desired effect. I am not after the bumps so much although I do not mind looking muscular at all, it is the strength I am looking for; lean and mean.

I am working on learning a bit more about the blog and how to make it jump and jive a little. The use of personal pictures is still a bit of a mystery. I have to figure out how to get a net site that the Blogger will source....the earthlink.net and Yahoo photo managers don't seem to let the Blogger in.

I spent some time catching up on reading. I am in the 6th or 7th DRAGON RIDERS OF PERN book with a whole bunch to go until I am finished.

I did polish off the NYTimes Crossword at lunch; e-z going in the early week then more difficult each day until the industrial strength Saturday grand finale. The BIG Sunday puzzle is at Thursday plus strength.

No movie today or tomorrow as half the audience-John-has other commitments.

Quiet day. Zzzzzzzzzzz.

Even supper is a sleeper; ham you don't have to heat and it is already sliced.

// posted by esrose @ 3:33 PM (0) comments

STAYING ON MESSAGE

So Dean said his truth today in an important speech out here. Sorta my truth too.

"Let me be clear:  My position on the war has not changed".

"The difficulties and tragedies we have faced in Iraq show that the administration launched the war in the wrong way, at the wrong time, with inadequate planning, insufficient help, and at unbelievable cost.  An administration prepared to work with others in true partnership might have been able, if it found no alternative to Saddam's ouster, to then rebuild Iraq with far less cost and risk". 

And true to form, Lieberman and Kerry attacked him for it.

What I like about this guy is that he does not equivocate. He says what he believes. I do not even mind if what he believes changes; the sign of a flexible mind. We do not see much of that around in the Dems (least of all the aforementioned Lieb and Kerry) or the Repubs.

Did you know that George Bush calls him Dean-O? This is a sign that he is strongly on the Bush radar. The White House gang are figuring that he is the one they are going to have to campaign against.

The LA Times says now that 32% of the DNC is for Dean.

I am getting there.

His whole speech is at: THE DEAN FOREIGN POLICY SPEECH 121503

PARTY DOG

In compensation for giving Franklin a lick and a promise for his first birthday (actually HE licked and we promised), we took him to one of his best places today in the very best way that we could take him: In the Jeep to PetSmart!

He loves PetSmart--the smells, the other dogs, the attentive people (overly attentive from his Dads' view), the toys, the treats!

He 'gets' that we are going there about a half mile from the store--there are signposts: the desert changes, you can SEE the store, and we are obviously changing our mood (he is a great observer and responder to mood--and our mood in this case is the mental prep for the puppy explosion that is about to occur) so he starts to salivate, fidget and breathe heavily --pant.

By the time we arrive he is NUTS! GONZO! So much so that today he jumped out the back hatch without the usual sit and stay observance (which got him a sharp slap on the butt). He lunges for the door ("HEEL-goddamit") and strains at the leash; this never occurs in any other phase of his life except maybe going into the groomers--the second best place to go--in the jeep. Once he is in the doors, he just relaxes and starts to 'smells the roses'; he llooks around and actually saunters through the aisle as we shop; stopping here and there and occasionally trying something out. Those PetSmart people are 'smart' about what to put on the lower shelves!

He got a birthday present--a new soy protein 'bone'--which looks like it will work as nothing else has. Franklin classes out as an 'aggressive chewer' and he can shave a soft nylabone down to its constituent parts in a quarter hour. I stand by with a bag to pick up all pieces over 1/4 inch ("DO NOT ALLOW UNSUPERVISED CHEWING"). Well I did it once. This one--the soy protien lasted an hour and is still mostly intact and no pieces and he loves it. What else could we want?

We also bought a few Christmas trinkets.

A notable quote from our friend Randy. "When I was a kid I thought Christmas was for adults. When I got older I thought Christmas was for children. Now I think Christmas is a time for dogs."

Randy is Franklin's DogFather (reverse the first three letters to get the idea) and so what he says goes. The dog is gettin' all the stuff under the tree!

HOT LINKS

Now we learn to create a link.

Let's try it. Of course, you cannot see what I am doing but you will see the result.

Every day I look at this site: THE BOROWITZ REPORT

Did it work?

Yes it did.

Two good things just happened. Soon all my links will be clickably HOT and YOU now have a source of daily pleasure and sometimes, even, LOL Falling on the FLO-ha-OO-heh heh-OOOOOORRRR happiness. Well, if you like this kind of humor. Borowitz.

THE LEARNING PROCESS or

esrose LEARNS HOW TO DO COMPLICATED STUFF

You may read below under Sunday that I am taking a tutorial from my son Dave on making the blog do tricks like bold and colors and photos off the web.

OK that is the bold part there in the title.

Now let's try to make it red

esrose learns how to do complicated stuff

oh boy I think i am getting it

Blogger only prompted me to correct my work three times and I learned on each one.


esrose learns how to do MORE complicated stuff

How is that for a little eye candy AND demonstration of my new adeptness's!

Wowee.

new title: esrosedotblog JUMPS INTO THE WATER or maybe just GETS ITS FEET WET

And how do I get MY picture on here which is not on the web but 'in' my computer.

Daaaaavvve!

LIKE I SAID: (below)

From this mornings Wall Street Journal (WSJ)

Focus for U.S. Turns to Trial and Ending Insurgency
With Saddam Hussein's arrest, the U.S. now must navigate the turbulent waters of bringing the fallen dictator to justice. And while the capture gives President Bush a huge political lift, it revives questions about U.S. claims of banned weapons.

The capture also injects new volatility into the fight against an increasingly violent anti-American insurgency. A car bomb killed eight Iraqi policemen in Baghdad, bringing to 25 the number of people killed in such attacks in two days.

CIRCUS!:

Yesterday was consumed with and by the Cirques de Soliel.

We went to the Pamona Fairplex (LA County Fairgrounds) to see VAREKAI the new tent show.

It is OK! Stunning in parts and a little of a let down in others.

For some unexplained reason, two acts were left out; one started and ended abruptly. Weird.

We have seen, maybe, ten Cirques shows now, and John says that maybe it is something that you can only do so many times and then you begin to see behind the wizard's curtain.

As usual, I think that John may be right.

We met Randy and his new friend Tom in the parking lot, had lunch, visited a while and saw the show.

We found out that Randy is getting a house! He was second in line in a bid on a condo in Long Beach and the first offer fell through. It is a great place and we are sooooooo happy for him.

Another kind of excitement on the trip was getting lost after the show and shouting at each other for awhile--the usual about 'you never ask directions' (just like a man) and all that cliche garbage that people get into but with two men, well, never mind.

I will not tell you who got lost and who got to holler as it is all the same and once played out, everything gets quiet; and it does not matter. It could have been either one of us.

By the time we got to the 10 and headed home--in the RAIN--in the NEW SEBRING CONVERTIBLE LXI we were happy lovers again and all was forgotten. The benefit of 28 years and knowing it is all just stuff.

The new car is a dream on the highway and is wind and water proof! Of course, it should be, but many of them are not.

BIRTHDAY BOY:

So we had a short birthday for Franklin. He got sung to and petted and then abandoned to his dogsitter Dan for the day.

They had a good, but quiet, time as Franklin gets a little shut down in a new situation.

But all was well when we returned.

He stayed very very close to us through the evening! Usually an inch behind us as we walked around and directly between us when we walked anywhere more or less together.

SADDAM:

You know? I will be completely honest with you.

We were totally wrapped up in getting out of here to go to the circus.

I did my Sunday bike ride (the coldest this year), showered, made us lunch. Fretted over details. And so on.

I sort of glanced at the news and saw the headline and it did not sink in. I just went ahead with things.

Then, Dan got here and we prepped and all; and as I was going to shut down the computer--sleep--I looked and there it was with the picture and all on Yahoo.

I had no real reaction. I was curious of course, but it had no emotional hit with me at all.

Here is the funny part. I looked at the picture of this unkempt disheveled man and felt sorry for him.

It still means nothing to me that he has been found.

I do not have a lot of 'retribution' energy in me. I get it intellectually but it has no resonance.

My greatest concern is that it will mean nothing to anyone there either and the killing will proceed; and we will be stuck, as we have been before, with an intractable situation.

I feel a little funny putting this reaction down in the blog as I think other people would think that maybe it is a bit unpatriotic. How many more qualifiers can I have in THAT sentence?

Nevertheless, I think that I am VERY patriotic, perhaps to a fault some time. I believe fervently in fundamental AMERICAN values.

But this thing just seems so fucking sad somehow.

And I determined in the beginning of this that I would be as honest as I could in the blog thing and if I could not be honest I would leave whatever it is out.

Does that make sense?

NOTE: The following entry was not written by ESR. He gave me his login info so I could demonstrate some of the finer points of HTML. I took the ball and ran with it. And he can always delete it... - dr.

ROUGHING IT

Life in the desert is a little less formal than that in the big cities back east. Sure, I have to worry about things like shorts vs. long pants (see below), but while I place a certain importance on my appearance, sometimes the rugged outdoor life that I lead means that conventional grooming habits go by the wayside. Case in point: my new beard. John isn't crazy about it (and Franklin barks), but I feel more like 'me' with it, if you know what I mean. What do you think?



HARK THE HAROLD ANGELS SING

I couldn't be more proud of my son Dave and his friend Hal. After many years of silence, Hal's publication The Harold Herald has re-appeared. Even if - for now - it is only some links to old content, I feel these boys are on their way to greatness. God love 'em.

// posted by esrose @ 8:35 PM (0) comments

TODAY'S FILM:

FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF (1986) is not one of the NYTimes Best 1000 of the 20th Century but it should be. It is not difficult to see Matthew Broderick's career beginning in this hilarious John Hughes movie (Hughes' best? Probably.). It was not Broderick's first film (39 of them)but it was his most conspicuous.

We laughed our asses off.

I remember James Broderick, Matthew's dad, on television in the 60s. He was Brenner in the series of the same name and was in 'all' of the 'Theaters":Kraft, Hallmark, etc.

NOTSOBAD:

We still hear the snickers from back east and other locales about our new Governor and the process by which we selected him; the usual silent and not so silent scorn for the wierdness of the west coast. Not that we are sensitive about it or anything. When all is said and done we have the weather and weather trumps even good politics. And, it is looking like maybe; just maybe, we have a good political process too. Recalls and initiatives scare the hell out of a lot of people and sometimes they go wrong; but a lot of the time they go right too.

Nevertheless, it is quite a surprise to us (and should be to the non-Californian) that the Guv has pulled off quite a coup in the deadlocked legislature. He has made a deal that could work to get us back on the road to fiscal stability--'Ve muzt get our fizcul houz in order'! Yeh, we snicker a little too but there he is, doin' it.

And, I LIKE the way he did it. He ran around the Republicans--his own party, if you will recall--and went directly to the Democratic leadership and worked out a solution which they signed on to. Needless to say, the Republicans--or some of them--are pissed--as usual righteously so. There are hard hearted idealogues on both sides of the aisle.

He has the stuff to do this kind of thing. And, as it turns out Maria is also in on the work. You can see that it is all first names out here. This is mostly because we have trouble typing the names Schwarzenegger and Shriber over and over--"now does she have the -sch construction too or...". Pity the poor newspaper person.

I did not vote for recall and I certainly did not vote for Arnold; but I gotta' admit the guy has done what he said he would (the lib LA Times headlined that he had caved on his campaign promises--they got egg on their face; the next day they headlined that he had achieved them).

The thing is, that ex-Governor-Davis was never able to transcend this two headed ogre of partisan government. He fed and aggravated the conflict all of the time.

The people may have been right. Of course, I believe that in the long run they always are. But, here we have them right in the short run too.

I know that everyone worries about us back there; so, be calm.

We will do OK; and incidentally, how is your budget doing?

Do you know where your legislators are tonight?

STRIKES:

Sadder, and unresolved are the strikes (now the Teamsters are out also) against the major food chains. It is in the 8th week and no resolution is in sight.

I do not cross picket lines and so have had to go to another chain which has a different contract to shop. I like the new place. It is a little further but it has some nice features that my Vons (Safeway) lacked. There are a LOT of people who have done the same. The lots at the struck stores are empty.

I suspect that a lot of us will not go back to where we shopped before.

The cause is just and they are making 200 a week strike pay. Tough times.

PLUG IN THE DIKE:

I see that George himself has jumped forward to put his finger in the Halliburton leak.

See below.

It could be a gusher.

THE LONG AND SHORT OF IT:

Big decisions each morning: do I wear short or long pants today?

If I go short, my knees will get cold if I have to sit in a cold room (as in the Meeting that I will be going to in about an hour).

If I go long, I will be uncomfortable as soon as the sun gets even a 1/4 way up.

A complication arises from socks. It is too cold for sandals with no socks. Do I wear white? Colors? Does it look dorky?

And if I wear long pants much in the winter, the hair wears off my legs in funny spots so that I look like a tourist when I start wearing shorts again.

This is the kind of stuff that makes living in the desert so problematic.

LYNX:

I was told that a good blog had lots of links to other sites--that being one of the main ideas of it all--the global net community and all that.

So there are links; but I am having trouble making them HOT so that you can click on them and get the referenced site.

I am getting tutored on this from Dave Rose but I am only half way to the solution. BLOGGER (my host site) is getting that I want to heat the link up but they won't let me all the way in. I am missing something.

In the meantime, you will have to copy and paste. Sorry. I am working on it.

CHATTIN' IT UP:

I have two new tech-breakthroughs this year. I am a blogger--look at mmmmeeeee! And, I am a chatter!

I am the communications marvel of the 21st Century.

When I got my eMac, it had this iChatAV hardware on it and "nothing would do" but being ON it....not me talkin' here but son Dave and friend Todd. There was a lot of nagging.

So I signed up. My tag is 'erlstan'. I use the AIM Instant Messaging ISP offered through AOL. You can sign up too. Just go to

AIM Instant Messaging Center

It is free and you do not have to belong to AOL.

It is fun. I have chat buddies! Dave and Todd (for sure); Paul and Tom Rose along with our friend Marty who I stumbled into one night while I was 'available'. She sent me an email at the same time I was on and the connection connected. Apparently, if I send an email to a chat person there is a bell that goes off or something and we are linked or whatever. I don't get that part.

Boy, am I glad that I taught myself to touch type (when I was in my fifties too) with Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing. My fingers fly; chatting away with the other fingers on line. AND you can do threesomes too but, as in the other applications of threesomes, it does not work out very well. There is always someone left out.

Now on top of the typing type of chat, we have added VIDEO! The new Apple iChatAV (and a 150 dollar camera/firewire hookup) uses the same AIM system. It is hard at first getting over the techno shock of SEEING the person you are talking too. Yeh, I have a phone but this is V-I-D-E-O ! But, we have gotten used to it.

As in the type-type of chat, it seems hard to say goodbye with this medium. We have learned to decisively and, if need be, cruelly QUIT when the time comes and let it go.

Everyone can type-chat. Not everyone can video. The question of compatibility between iChatAV (MAC system for video and audio instant messaging) and PC based systems has been answered definitively in this month's MacWorld.

There ISN'T any compatibility.

If I am MAC (I am) and you are MAC we can see and talk to each other. If you are PC, we cannot INTERACT.

BUT: you could see me if I video-ed (apparently) but no audio. There is a funny way that it can be done; but why would you? Well, hard times create strange needs or the satisfaction threshold goes down. Maybe it would be good to see me whilst we type.

Evidently AOL (AIM) is working on a cross program setup; but, in the meantime we are stuck yet again with the incompatibility of the two systems. Someday, Steve and Bill will sit down and work this out.

So give it a try! You could be a chat buddy. Just get the software free from AIM and try it out.

I am erlstan. You ......?

TODAYS FILM:

THE SWIMMER with Burt Lancaster (1968); based on a short story by John Cheever. This was a vanity project for Burt. He loved the story (me too) and wanted to do a movie of it and he got to do the whole thing in nothing but his swim trunks. It has a guy swimming through all the pools of Westchester County to get 'back to himself'. The swim(s) reveal who he is and what he has become; not good news, as it turns out. There are some holes in the story; but it is beautifully photographed and Burt is great.

More about THE SWIMMER at http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0063663/

I gave it a three on the Netflix scale. Definitely not one of the NYT 1000 Best 20th Century Films; but it would make a list of the 'good enough'.

The film is by Frank Perry who, often with his wife Eleanor, produced a limited set of successes including MOMMY DEAREST. They liked to work with themes about neurotic people (WOMAN ON THE EDGE OF A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN and DAVID AND LISA).

I remember that critics always agonized over the Perrys' 'flawed masterpiece' syndrome. It often appeared as though they got about 90% of it; then, decided to wrap the package and ship it out before the final, crucial, finishing touches. To wit: Sydney Pollack was brought in to add a scene when Perry left this project over creative differences; but Perry kept the credits.

Despite all of this, I looked forward to Perry's films with excitement because they always had an edge and took a lot of risks. They were never run of the mill or predictable films.

More about Frank Perry at http://us.imdb.com/name/nm0675068/

COLOR ME BROWN:

I thought that this was very interesting.

beyond_red_blue.html target>THE BIG MULTICOLOR MAP


I hate the 'red/blue' cliche way of designating people and whole States as one political thing or another--off the teevee maps for kri'sakes.

I hate it so much that I cannot remember which color I am.

We left fresh green (Boston MA-Upper Coasts) for rich earthy brown El Norte.

Click on the brown. It is pretty descriptive of us (J&I) in the US (el Norte) in the USA. I am glad that we moved. It is an exciting place to be right now.

This is a lot like a great book called the NINE NATIONS OF NORTH AMERICA.

You can get a 14 page PDF overview at:

9 NATIONS

WORKOUT:

John took the new car out for 'a spin' yesterday and came back two hours later.

They went out to Dillon Road which runs parallel to the 10 for a looooooong time--two lanes, through the desert, lots of rockin' and rollin' because Dillon is laid out straight and goes over all dunes and other land forms without benefit of curving or banking. Most older roads in the desert use this method of construction, allowing car and driver to compensate for the variety of terrain.

LXI passed with flying colors and John came back with the flush of a 16 year old boy who just got his first solo car privileges.

NO WORKOUT:

I blanked two weight training workouts earlier in the week; jury and car delivery. So, I am extending the layoff into a full week to get the break that I am supposed to take every 10-12 weeks or so. I think it is to let the ligaments catch up or something.

Like I said, I havn't had one since the guys were here in August--the 03 BRO TOUR. So here I am in the AM, blogging instead of doing todays 'Legs'.

Why is it so hard to take a break?

Don't answer that.

I have just put the next one into the calendar for the first week in March. Check in then to see if I postpone that one for four months.

GASP:

We had weather! It showered then stormed then got seriously cold last night; hovering just above the thirties. The pool guy cleaned the pool and then the wind covered it with bougainvillea blossoms.

Do you think the stars are actually brighter when it is cold? Nooooooo. The air is drier and so the stars get to be bright and then there are many different velocity heat waves (still) in the air from the wildly various elevations of land mass and that makes them sparkle.

No matter why; they sure are pretty! A small gasp of appreciation emanated as I hit the back yard with Franklin this morning. I think I even heard a small gasp from the pup but, at the time, he was running to check the perimeter and sniff the air; all senses in operation. Guard dog! Life force.

So see? We DO have winter and while it does not feel very Christmas-ie it is a touch of winter. Bougainvilleas do not equate with holly berries, but still.....see ATMOSPHERICS below.

HEADLINES:

Walkin' through this morning's headlines, a few smiles:

I predicted this one:

"Dec 11, 6:20 PM ET LIEBERMAN USES GORE SNUB TO HELP CAMPAIGN (AP)

WASHINGTON - Democrat Joe Lieberman was looking for a way to energize his presidential campaign by promoting himself as the foil to front-runner Howard Dean, Al Gore snub may have done it.

Lieberman has not shied from showing his disappointment that the former vice president endorsed Dean this week without even a courtesy call in advance. Instead, the Connecticut senator is using the endorsement to portray Dean as a problem for the Democratic Party while capitalizing on the response to Gore's slight."

Ha ha. The politics of self pity, pouting and pique; of which Joe the Lieb is a champ.

And who would be surprised to read this one:

"Dec 12, 3:20 AM: HALLIBURTON MAY HAVE OVERCHARGED MILLIONS (AP)

WASHINGTON - A Pentagon audit has found Vice President Dick Cheney former company may have overcharged the Army by $1.09 per gallon for nearly 57 million gallons of gasoline delivered to citizens in Iraq, senior defense officials say."

What were they thinking?

The thing about the Bushies is that their sense of entitlement makes them tone deaf to the vibrations of the big grab; deaf thieves. Let's hear a little background music from Teapot Dome.

LOSERS VEEPERS:

One thing similar about these two items; in our Republic, there is no protection against making a fool of yourself whether you are a wannabe Veep or a big fat Dick of a Veep.

THE THREE PUPPETEERS

Which brings up a few questions. After all this stuff, will Cheney will make it into the 2004 election or not? He IS carrying some unwanted baggage. But then that is sort of his Veep job; baggage carrying.

Has it already been decided? The other day, I saw GW against one of those awful blue backdrops with phony logos all over it that said BUSH/CHENEY 2004. Is it too late to get a new backdrop?

And if this Halliburton thing goes too far would he have to exit before the election (shades of Spiro Agnew)?

Yet, the Dick has two roles doesn't he? I have always assumed that he is one of the three W puppeteers: Rove, Card, and Cheney.

Apparently, holding the strings and being in the show are too much of a strain. If he gets too loaded up with baggage to run, does he also have to let go of his strings? Can you carry the bags and hold the puppet thing? He does have a woofy heart (and still obese). How much can the man take? Carrying bags, stringing GW along, running for re-election and covering his ass at the same time. No wonder he is a hero to the right.

FILMS:

Movie day today: SATURDAY NIGHT AND SUNDAY MORNING/ Albert Finney/ Angry young man and so forth. 1961. Pretty good--not all THAT angry actually; sorta' sweetened with romance. A four star (out of five) rating for the Netflix people. A NYTimes 1000 Best Film. We are working down the list to see them all with some other non-Best in between. I figure that this will take about five years.

STORM HOLE:

After the movie, Franklin and I got out between showers. There was a rainbow over the Eastern Valley for half the hour of it. Within minutes of our return, the rain hit again with fierce winds. Our moment of grace was over. The desert is all extremes and this little sequence is no exception. I like to think that I can 'smell' the hole in the storm and make it 'between'. Today I am right.

HOLIDAY ATMOSPHERICS:

Every winter a friend from back East says or asks a question like this: (from my friend Jim in Cincinnati, OH):

"I imagine it's hard for you to get into the "Christmas spirit" when it's 85'
and sunny. Back here, putting up the lights to stave off the darkest days of
the year, changing into turtlenecks, and building fires in the fireplace all
bring the season to life."

So do we need cold hardship to have the holiday spirit? Noooooooooooooo.

Here is my answer to Jim and all the other northerners who feel sorry for us down here in the 'tropics'.

"You are over-stating a bit with the 85. We are actually struggling through the more frigid sixties this week and usually have to settle for the mid-seventies for warmth. And, we lose our light in December too; often faster and sooner as we are up against the mountain--sunsets at three with a long long twilight. Sunrises are earlier though...it is flat out there in the East.

But, this is mere quibbling. You are right, the weather here provides undeniably non-traditional holiday atmospherics. It takes some work to gin up the 'feelings' but actually it is not too too hard.

There is community compensation behavior. My friend Charles, the shrink, hypothesizes that this arises from mass guilt feelings as many of us have slipped away from our Northern homes and hearths. We frantically light the landscape to assuage these feelings. We get the abandonment 'issues' from the other end. We are the abandon-ers.

Whatever. I have never seen more twinkle lights anywhere but here. AND we are all bloodthinned from the constant warmness of it all, so, when the warmness falters a little in December, we all wear sweaters AND scarves and, if we have them, mink coats too. We are actually too hot most of the time but there is that compensation thing again. A little suffering eases the guilt.

There is a festival of lights parade the first December Saturday (notice the non-sectarian-ness of that) to get us revved up for the season and, I think, ready to shop. Everyone in it has to have at least 35 lights on their body and most folks go way over that. John even wore lights this year to WATCH the parade. Some of us need more acting out than others. Floats have twinklers that number in the thousands. So it is very SEASONAL if not traditional.

SNOW? That we cannot do at this level, although Southern California has a booming artificial snow industry for events all over the area. It is shaved ice blown down by the ton.

AND if we want real northeastern style winter, we can drive up the mountain to Idyllwild in about an hour--a mile high--well 5500 feet.

We drove up last year for Christmas dinner and had a foot of snow to walk in and some icy sidewalks to slip on. It was cold--in the twenties! Dinner was next to a roaring fire. Then, when dinner was over, we came right down the mountain (on switchbacks overlooking the Coachella Valley lights) and our traditional eastern winter was over.

Oh, and about that fire; we have a gas grate that goes on with a whoooosh! Wood is out of the question; there is some but it comes from somewhere back East and it is illegal--smog laws. So if all else fails, we turn on the gas for a happy holiday.

GORED:

It might have been insensitive and rude for Al Gore to bypass his Demo buddies; no warning phonecalls about the Dean endorsement. But it isn't a very good idea for Joe Lieberman to whine about it. He is a big boy isn't he? One more reason that the guy from Connecticut can't cut it.

PILE ON:

And while I am at it, what is the point of all the lesser candidates attacking Dean? We learn less about them, they look like jerks (although that is hard with zombies like Kerry and Lieberman) and they underline the fact that this has been the mode of the Demos since 2000; infighting and lack of a discernible message.

While they are all on the pile all we can see are their asses and Dean with all his energy somehow being on the TOP of the pile! Electoral magic!

The problem they all have with Dean is that he might perform restorative surgery and put the spine back into the Democratic Party.

He has got the stuff. If he can get it all focused now, he has the game.

He is looking better to me all the time. Maybe I can resume sending money to the Party without figuring I am just paying for Terry McAuliff's bloated overhead.

End of rant.

SEXY LXI:

We got the car! It turns out to be an almond (tan) sparkle finish with a close to the same color top--the standard beige. He has black trim, and is actually now an LXI and not a Touring model. So, we played with calling him Al (almond) but he quickly became LEXI.

It performs; but we knew it would. The Sebring is a well designed and de-bugged model. The engineeering is superb and the drive is solid, easy-handling, and has a bit of the neck snap to the startoffs. It has a tight steering radius and can do the job on corners.

We are happy; and he just fit into our Fifties garage--about 6 inches longer than Woody or the Jeep.

AIRY:

Another SoCal thing to like. Back East buying a car is FROUGHT. You need runners for the insurance, you need runners for plates, you gotta watch the details in the transaction and all. Out here there is nothing like it. The plates will come along when they come along. In the meantime there is a paper stuck to the windshield.

The insurance (if you already have a policy) is a phone in. "We got a car"; "What's the VIN?".That is it. Bang.

In its way, this is anxiety producing for me as I am a little distrustful of things that are too easy or too airy. But it all worked.

PLATES:

I made a deal with John to have no rainbows, stickers, or other paraphenalia on the car. He agreed but then asked for a special plate.

We can have a panopy of special backgrounds: whales, Tahoe, 9-11, kids, or PALMS on a beach. If you take the palms option and have a thick plate holder you don't see the water and it looks just like the desert.

We will have PALMS.

Then, in the usual negotiation demand creep, he said he wanted a vanity number.

OK, I said with some degree of confidence that it would not work (they are very hard to get as they have to be unique and CA never retires a vanity plate so there are decades of plate-names gone).

First try: JONERL works.

And we have a plate with palms and our own letters.

Are you zoned out yet on this? It will soon be over. The car will be on the road and it will be on to the next thing.

Zzzzzzzzzzz.

FEW ARE CHOSEN:

I am not on the jury. We spent all day in jury selection and then at the end of the day, the three gentlemen in question took a plea bargain and bacame thugs. The case was resolved without trial. This does show the effect of a potential trial on the defendants and the power of a jury standing in wait to get things concluded.

I felt and feel OK about it and the whole process of resistance leading to acceptance that I went through. It was a pretty good exercise in patience and tolerance at a very low cost.

PICKUP:

Today, we are scheduled to pick up the car; another exercise in tolerating and being patient with a process. John has done a lot of the leg work so it should not be too terrible but there are all those papers and all those kinks and turns and a little arm twisting potential. But, we like the salesman and the agency, so how bad can it be?

NORMAL:

I am ready to get back to normal (if there is really such a state); actually I think I mean that I am ready for the ROUTINE to resume. That is not going to happen until tomorrow I think. For a start, I will be in the gym this morning. Then I will go to do my shopping that was 'supposed' to be done yesterday and I am not sure about making my Wednesday Meeting. I will just do the 'next indicated thing' and let it play out.

GYM DANDY:

This jury thing is putting a real crimp in my athletic life. I missed the gym yesterday (chest and back) and will miss it today as well (arms). I am a guy on a routine and to crack it up is stressful. Up at 3AM, walk the pup, review the email and news, meditate, eat a first snack, and out the door to the gym by 445 at the latest. Not so today. Or yesterday either.

On the other hand, I am sort of committed to taking gym breaks every 10-12 weeks so that my body can have a break AND get surprised when it goes back to work but I haven't taken one of those since the Rose boys were here in August and maybe not then either.

So now I have one--a layoff. The universe does for me what I do not do for myself.

I will not lose it in two days. Now, two weeks (if I win the job interview for jury member); that is another thing. But I will not worry it until the time to worry comes; if ever.

SCRATCH AND SNIFF:

Franklin was wild to go out this morning. He whined, he scratched at the door, he jumped and twirled. I was apprehensive about actually letting him out but, nature calls and we have to go out their and do our business sometime. When we exited the door, I immediately knew why he was so excited!. There was the faint whiff of skunk in the air!

We have had our first encounter with a woods pussy; so, I did not look forward to another session. On the other hand, we have not had a chance to try out our 'foolproof' remedy; hydrogen peroxide, baking soda, and dish detergent sponged into the fur. The first-session tomato juice bath was not the most succesful (perhaps we should not have substituted V8) and the groomer's special bath left residues of skunkiness on his nose.

I am willing to give the new 'foolproof' approach a run; but not today.

We sort of ran around the yard together at 345 AM (I slept in today getting ready to show up for my jury selection process all good looking like) with F groaning, barking and whining (his patented sound effects); looking for trouble as though it was a life goal and me shusshing and saying to cool it.

Even a successful, if high speed, pee and poop--the true purpose of the outdoor visit--did not stop the low groan of the wild animal on a mission. BUT we did not have our other encounter with nature and both of us came inside with a sigh of relief although he kept the energy bubbling for awhile before he crawled into his crate for another nap before the real day begins.

AND THEN:

We should have a montage of those flipping calendar pages or the sound of a clock ticking.

Here is the latest on the jury duty front. I went, I sat, I missed the first two player drafts and began to move emotionally from resistance to being called towards a mild resentment that they were NOT calliing me.

Then, reality bit and I was called to serve. Three men commited an armed robbery and they think that it might have involved the three gentlemen sitting in the courtroom. I did not immediately disqualify for hardship so I am back tomorrow at 9 AM for the hard vetting. I think I could do this but it is estimated that the trial will last two weeks--what could be so complicated? It would be kinda interesting. Maybe. Well.

It is interesting to see my attitude begin to shift from rebellion and defiance to willingness. Once I took the oath I found myself unable to lie about my 'hardship' in serving and the case itself is one which I could find no objection to sitting on. It is not a civil case and a robbery, even an armed one, seems, well, even INteresting.

Now: tick tick tick tick tick I am due back tomorrow at 9AM for the grilling and the weeding; grilled weeds.

Bzzzzzzz CONTINUED:

Whilst I was sweating out the courtroom scene (watching Regis, finishing the Sunday NYT XWord, and chit chatting with a few other people I knew who were serving time with me), John was cruising around in various Chrysler Sebring Convertibles and looking at the ins and outs of a new new one versus a lease-return--27,000 miles and only 3000 dollars less when rebates are considered--no contest I say--get the new one even if the 2004 grill looks funny with the license plate mounted on it. Sleeping on it, but moving toward a close of the sale. Almond glitter, not white. White looks 'cheap'.

HEADLINES:

I noticed that I can't tell that there are headlines. First change other than being ters-er: use caps for the headlines.

READY AND SORTA WILLING:

I am half dressed for the jury duty here at 5 AM and am about to set the wheels in motion to get the rest of myself dressed, meditate, and have breakfast before my 6 AM departure. I have painted myself into a bit of an anxious corner with all of this, but the meditation will help.

ATMOSPHERE:

It is curiously odorous outside this morning--creosote, sage, other desert plants that put out big scent when wet. But, it is not wet! It did rain in the Santa Rosas yesterday though, I could see the showers when Franklin and I walked out in the afternoon. MMMmmmmmmm. Inhale.

'BRING IT':

Franklin just succeeded in 'bringing' the paper all the way from the driveway, into the house, across the kitchen, and onto 'his' chair. The amazing part of this is not so much the physical feat but that he managed to stay committed to it for that length of time. He is getting to be such a great 'big dog'. He goes for his date at the 'K-9 Country Club' today. When I get home I will not have a shaggy dog.

In the Dark:

It is clouded over today; so, we missed the sunrise. The colors in winter are quite dramatic as the sun's angle is steeper--or something. More of the silica in the air gets engaged I think.

For awhile, I thought that the sunrise time had shifted radically when I was not paying attention; but that is not the case. The 'cause' was the unusual event of complete cloud cover; about a one in twenty shot.

Biking backward:

Went out on the regular weekly bike ride and took advantage of the lapse in sunglare by doing the 18 mile route backward; clockwise. This makes the ride altogether different of course. What hills that are usually up are now down and routine downs are up. The scenery shifts significantly and sights occur in front which normally are to the back. I feel as though I took a trip to another place. Cheap vacation. The bunnies and the road runners were all in the same places though.


Bzzzz continued:

The mild drama of the new car purchase continues. John just told me that he prefers the Touring model of the Sebring convertible (see below) over the GTC. We are in the fine tuning (yawn) phase of the selection. I am not indifferent but I am less, shall we say, engaged in this than John. If you want to play the game of wringing out the last best detail take a look at:

SEBRING CONVERTIBLE

And send HIM the results of your study.

Hung Jury:

My detachment is a bit less than perfect. I notice that the 'whelm' of jury duty hangs a bit heavier than I would like. My 'easy does it' stance is crumbling a bit. I just realized that I will have to leave here at about 6AM to get to the Indio Courthouse in time for the 730 last minute arrival time. This is a new development; an hour earlier startup.

Am I over-reacting?

Buzzzzz:

There is a background vibration in the house as we get closer to buying a new car.

Palpable excitement.

It started with the 'which' of it. Which of the two cars will be replaced; the 1997 Cherokee or the 1984 Town and Country Le Baron Convertible/Mark Cross Edition.

Sadly, the convertible Woody. We got him when we arrived in Palm Springs---the Cherokee brought us across the USA. He was a forlorn little guy sitting in a garage lot with a 'for sale' sign on him. We took him home and scrubbed him up and bought him quite a few new clothes and parts. We have used him day in and day out for almost 7 years.

It is a complicated decision; but not too hard to make, once you figure that the Woods is wheezing and not really reliable for any long distances. The Jeep is also on limited milage. We are an 'Enterprise is our second (third) car' house. Always better to rent for the long trip. But the Cherokee has an easy 50,000 more miles to go before we put him on a short leash.

Woods is 110,000 miles; the Jeep is 54,000. And so on. I will spare you the details.

We need two cars because it is Southern California and you gotta drive two at a time. Some believe that you really need THREE cars for two people to really be SoCal folk.

We need a 'rough' car for the dog and stuff.

We need a convertible for the fun of driving. It IS Palm Springs. We have the top down year round.

So it is the convertible. We have more fun than we do rough stuff, although often, they are the same thing.

We have been through the mill on the Toyota, the Honda, and the bigger Mazda; all of which compete with the Chrysler Sebring. We have thought bigger and grander (but not better) of the Audi and the Volvo.

And we have to come out with the Sebring. It holds four (not easily but the others do not hold two easily) and, importantly, we can continue to go to Crystal Chrysler for service. It turns out that service trumps almost any detail about the car itself.

White. Beige top. No frills. Well, other than the car itself.

It will be our main car and, for awhile, we will eschew Enterprise as a second car and use the Sebring for longer travel.

Now the 'when' of it. Soon. We thought that we could use the deductability of the sales tax this year but it turns out that there isn't any deductibility any more....when did that happen? But, there ARE deals at the dealers--outright discounts, rebates! And besides, the momentum for the car is going so we will make haste slowly but surely.

Now for the bottom line.

The Woods will go up for sale in the Town and Country Club Newsletter so that we can get its 'real' value as a near-antique. It is relatively worthless on a trade-in.

While we wait for a buyer, we will have THREE cars! We will have (at least temporarily) made it into the SoCal culture!

Skywatch:

One of the first things I do in the morning is to walk out with Franklin as he takes his morning pee.

Sooner or later, hot or cold, windy or calm, I get out of myself and away from the dog and look up above my normal eyeline.

I am welcomed in my day by the stars!

When the sky is super clear as it is today they seem to be within my reach.

It is about three or four in the morning and there isn't a lot of earth light. The desert air is so dry, and the horizon so wide, that the stars' clarity always gives me a whole-body jolt.

This time of year is special because Orion is there; the first constellation that I learned. Orion, the hunter, is a hunk. He has a dog Sirius with him too. Hey, Orion. Hey Sirius!

I will go back inside and start the day with the morning rituals. Some of these will involve conscious meditation; but none of it will match this starry start and afterglow.

All of it will be enhanced by this beginning; the stillness of the welcoming, waiting sky.