Monday, April 30, 2012
FARM BOYS
Today's gay film is the German
Stadt Land Fluss / Harvest (2011)
This is one of a number of innovative, deeply imagined gay films now being produced in both Europe and the United States.
This starts as an almost documentary look at a teaching farm in Germany where apprentices work side by side with professional farmers to raise, in this case, cattle and carrots.
The two c's.
The apprentices are in a Program which gives them a degree which is actually required for working full time in a farm and includes management and such skills as scheduling, accounting and report writing.
Among the class are two young men (the only professional actors) who feel attracted towards one another. Interwoven in the farming narrative, we see the attraction develop to maturity and real love.
There is not a lot of sex in this film but it is extremely sexy. There is nothing hotter than to watch the energy of two people who are attracted to one another but not ready to make the moves or, once having made a move, taken the situation to the next step.
I have never seen a film like this one, let alone with a gay theme.
Very very good. I am buying the disc. The two guys are great. Not "lookers" but very worth looking at.
That makes it a 5 out of Netflix5.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
The whole thing.
Labels: Administration Obama, Barack Obama, Re-election of Barack Obama
SLOW BURN
Today's gay film is one of my very favorites.
Two Brazilian men are dating the same woman but "notice" each other in a way that tells us that there is more going on than meets the eye.
They become friends because one of them rationalizes that if he approaches the other he can distract his interest in the woman. A dubious premise. As we find in the film, this character, Bruno, is quite adept at thinking up ruses to get his way. What he doesn't bargain for is that interest will lead to attraction which will lead to a really bad case of a crush and falling in love with the other guy.
We don't know as much about the other guy's motives but through the silent looks and similar small cons he finds ways to be with Bruno.
The flow of the film is glacial, in a good way. The men do a dance which is slow and very sexy without anything, apparently, happening. But it is. It is.
The denouement is wonderful to see unfold and there are a few surprises up some sleeves that come out at the final scene.
I just adore this film. A five over and over again. This was my third or fourth time seeing it.
ORVIETTO
John sleeping in a Pope's palace tonight in Orvieto.
The pope has moved out.
This is his second night and third night stay so we won't hear from him until Tuesday.
Labels: travel
Saturday, April 28, 2012
RIDIN' AROUND
I worry that Booker lacks stimulation with only one dad so we both took a ride this afternoon. Mostly out to the Bogert Trail, high up overlooking South Palm Springs.
An old reliable ride. We just sit at the top of the hill and smell, look and listen.
We stopped back at the old neighborhood and rode around. More houses for sale than before.
We went past "our" house and there was no charge to it anymore. No outrage at what he had done to it, mostly paint. No worry about the plants. The ocotillo was in bloom.
It is kind of messy out front. A big pile of debris in front of the front stone dry wall. The first thing that we put in.
It has been two years for it to become not-our-house anymore.
Over.
Labels: history, neighborhood
GREEKS
Today's gay film was
Long Island Expressway. The geographic center of a film about a pederast and a 15 year old boy.
Brian Cox and Paul Dano, the first film for Dano who is now a career actor. Cox was top of the line when they made this film and still is. It says he was warned not to do it. Bad for the career but great for the film.
This is a tough subject to tackle but tackle they do.
We see the situational setup for the boy to be available and interested. We see the unseen forces that drive the older man.
The kid's father is in deep trouble. He is an architect builder whose latest development burned down. Aluminum wiring.
The kid's mother was killed in a car accident. On the Long Island Expressway.
Well acted, directed and photographed. Aside from the Expressway the suburb is Edenic. The kids are all over breaking in houses, doping, sexing.
How is this a gay film? Because it is the experience of a lot of gay men during their early adolescence. The local pullover is a source of income for boys who skip school to pickup Johns. A lot of these kids are gay first. The other delinquent stuff comes after.
It is hard to be sympathetic with a pederast. Cox nearly pulls it off. But, in the end, he is an evil bastard who knows enough about his compulsion to bust himself for it. He doesn't.
I saw this when it came out. I wanted to see it again. It is a 5 out of a Netflix5 because of the two viewings. But now that I have seen it again, I will let it settle back into being a threebie.
SAFE JOURNEY
John called to say that he is OK, very tired, going to bed in the Rome Airport Marriott.
He made all of his connections and he is pretty much right on time.
As for Booker and me, all is well. Booker is very aware that there is a change going on. One morning walk with the other Dad confirmed that.
He is a little sad and last night some bark/whine stuff. But he is OK this afternoon.
I feel like barking and whining a little too but after talking to my husband I know that he is safe and that all is well with him.
That is enough for me.
It looks like a barracks but he is only there to sleep.
Tomorrow, he is off to Orvieto.
Labels: travel
Friday, April 27, 2012
GAY TEEN ANGST
Todays gay film was on the 50 Favorites list. Number Ten
British film.
Two seniors, the school jock and a (committed and courageous) nerd fall in love and have a hidden relationship until circumstances and the courage of the nerd, out them. Or out the nerd and the campus star by implication.
Terrible stress.
The athlete bends to the social pressure.
A lot is learned and the nerd uses an award ceremony to come out publicly.
The young men say goodbye because the star can't hack it.
There are a lot of stories like this in film. This stands out because of the utter reality of the situation and the unbending courage of the gay boy who refuses to be bullied into silence any longer.
This is a very popular film again because, once again, we have to address the issue with respect to bullying.
It is important to note that not everything turns out OK. The boys really do love one another. One just cannot let go of the perks of stardom. Sad.
But the other is not going to back down from his own need to "get real".
This is a film worth watching a few times. I have seen it before, perhaps when it came out. The two young men are outstanding. A great story. A 5 out of Netflix5.
You might, like me, be afraid to see this film because it has "bad things" that happen but they are not all that bad compared to the results.
OFF AND RUNNING
John just called from LAX to say that he arrived OK (he drove as the cost of going to LA by air is incredibly high but you can fly back home for nothing on the oversea's ticket. One of those stupid anomalies of air travel).
His plane leaves at 730 pm. It is a long flight to Zurich then a short hop to Rome and on to his first night at the airport Marriott.
He will next call when he is settled there.
We, Booker and I, are pretty well situated. I am already behind. Whites to be taken out of the dryer and folded. Some other shit.
But soon we will be fine doing the double dad thing. I am not doing much else this week. A good thing.
Labels: travel
Thursday, April 26, 2012
LIFE OPENS UP
Today's film was the Italian
Le fate ignoranti / His Secret Life (2001)
A suburban wife finds that her husband, killed in an accident, had a double life.
Pursuing this unknown history, she discovers not only a lover who is a man but she also finds a way of life, a bohemian menage, which doubly amplifies the fact of his secrets.
The menage turns out to be a healing for her and she and the widower experience a lot of healing from the loss. Together.
I liked this for a lot of reasons. It is written and directed by Ferzan Ozpetek who also gave us Steam: A Turkish Bath which has similar ideas of a more floating sexuality and bonds with people who are strange. Very good.
I would not mind seeing it again. That is a 4 out of Netflix5.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
OLD RUGGED CROSS
This conflict has lasted a long time.
It is years since I wrote about it.
The Supreme Court wouldn't hear it and so it reverted to the lower courts who had approved a land exchange and there it is.
Basically unresolved.
It does not answer the questions raised by the people who don't want it there.
The cross has had a lot of action around it. Defaced and vandalized by some members of the opposition, it has been covered with a square plaque in recent years.
California Land Swap Ends Long Fight over Mojave Cross
Labels: christist watch
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
SLOTS
Not "sluts", slots. The idea behind the best one of the four gay films for today. Shorts too.
All four films on this DVD are good or better than good. Quite different. A short about the aftermaths of a gay rape between the victim and one of the men who comes back to help him out.
Then, a fake documentary about two late teens who fall in love forever and then.......
A cute romantic comedy and then the finale built on the idea of slot machine luck between a lawyer and a bike messenger and an elevator.
This is a good series. I saw the first one way back in time when I was traveling and had an art theater just down the street from my hotel in Philadelphia.
There are no bad shorts. If I don't like them nothing lasts too long with a short and I can relax and let it run on. It will be over soon.
Monday, April 23, 2012
ACTING GAY
Today's gay film was the French comedy
Le placard / The Closet (2000)
in which the main character, Daniel Auteuil, about to be fired, comes up with a modern solution. Claim to be gay and thus be protected by discrimination policies. This solution is powered further by the fact that the company makes condoms.
This is a farce that basically mocks corporate hypocrisy. There are lots of funny gags, none at the expense of gay people but lots at the expense of closet homophobes. Gerard Depardieu in a rare comic turn as a fag basher.
There is a lot more. I put it in here because it is very funny. It was in my queue for a later Auteuil fest.
It is nice to see straight people be amazed at the lengths the haters will go to stop "the gays" from taking over the world.
I have seen this once and now I saw it again. I will give it the same 4 out of Netflix5.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
HEAT
The other day, in the morning, I felt the edge of the real summer heat.
It is a sure point of change and it happens every year.
"This is the day it turns hot".
It is preceded by the day I notice that I am standing in the shade on a warm day. In winter we move to the sun.
And sure enough it has been over 100 for several days. Yesterday 105.
This is when our world changes a little bit. Air on at about noon. Off in the early morning.
The evening dog walks turn shorter and in the shade around the complex.
Booker and I go out front and lie on the grass for a sun bath. His coat can get extraordinarily hot in a very short time.
I have to water the few plants inside our house borders now. Only the HOA grass and plants get irrigated.
Changing patterns.
Heat.
And this is the second week of the Coachella Festival.
Last week the temps were moderate although you still wanted to be out of the direct sun. This weekend, a repeat of the program, is definitely Coachella hot.
Take a look at this great film of the 2010 fest.
Labels: fun. music, Palm Springs, weather
HOWDIDIT?
Today's gay film was the French/Canadian
Amnesia: The James Brighton Enigma (2005)
We have who done its, why did its?. This is a how did it happen.
A man finds himself naked in an alley in Montreal and all he remembers is that he is gay.
Not his name, how this happened, anything.
This is a great little movie. Tight as a tic and, they say, not a hundred percent "how" but with a reasonable hypothesis built on some facts and good conjecture.
I was not sure that this could happen to a gay man only but then realized that the stuff that adds up to the result is very gay.
This is one of those excellent Quebecois productions that never make it out of the small box they work in. Too bad because they are often wonderful movies.
This is one.
I would not mind seeing it again. But maybe knowing the answer to the riddle would take some of the charge out of it.
A 4 out of Netflix5 but then more a 3 if it is spoiled knowing the "trick".
Saturday, April 21, 2012
LIKE A RAINBOW
Jesus wants the rainbow back.
I didn't know that it was his or I wouldn't have voted it into the "gay agenda".
I never much liked the rainbow thing anyway. For awhile, Jesse Fucking Jackson had it going for him and I do think that he, at least, was/is a christian.
We actually took it from him because we were part of the rainbow coalition and, you know, "the gays" will definitely take any pretty thing they find in your place and sneak it out the door.
Incidentally, Palm Springs has a number of rainbows because of the little storms that come over the mountain in the morning but, most of all, we have them because we are gay, gay, gay.
I do get a little tired of these whiny jesus people who want everything back that we "stole" from them.
The rainbow is just part of it. We stole their sense of humor of which, now, they have none.
We stole the joy of sexuality from many of them. Obviously this goon is one of them. It is especially hurtful for the ones who are stuck in their closet and can't get OUT.
The other thing that we stole while we were taking the rainbow is their ideas of love and tolerance. He says so right here.
Reprinted in its entirety from The Maddow Blog, herewith.
Attention worldwide LGBT community: The religious right wants its rainbow symbol back. Now. And Dr. Ken Hutcherson, pastor and former linebacker for the Dallas Cowboys, is volunteering for the job. To wit (with our own annotations):
"Don't we understand that if our symbols can be hijacked, so too can everything else we hold dear?1 The rainbow is only one example of many where the church has passively sat by and allowed others to redraw lines on the playing field.2 Linguistic redistricting is a pet peeve of mine, so don't even get me started about terms like "tolerance," "justice" and "love."3 Those fish will be fried at a later date. But for now, I have a simple proposition: Let's take the rainbow back.4
"Yes, let's take back the rainbow for God.5 Let the homosexual community find a different religious symbol to commandeer. If they were feeling congenial, perhaps the Muslims would let them borrow their crescent moon.6 In these desperate economic times, maybe the Wiccans would rent the pentagram to them.7 I don't really care. What I want is for the Christian community to wake up, wipe the sleep from their eyes, and realize that they are in a spiritual battle that isn't going away and has no demilitarized zones.8 The rainbow is a symbol, but its meaning points to the very character of God.9 So Christians …use this God-given symbol for His glory.10 Using it won't make you a homosexual.11 It won't make you a New Ager.12 It won't make leprechauns real.13 But it might allow you to get into conversations with people who need to meet the very One Who gave us His promise in the first place.14
1 This is a stickup-- hand over all your red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet and no one will get hurt.
2 Dr. Hutchison WAS a linebacker. He played football, a sport with no homoerotic overtones whatsoever.
3 People that say "don't get me started," are never not started.
4 FYI: "the rainbow" is stashed in a gay vault in San Francisco and requires an Ocean's 11 style team heist to get it back.
5 Because without the rainbow the Christian faith has no symbols or iconography to represent itself. None.
6 …and if they're feeling extra congenial, their table saw.
7 Wiccans don't rent out the pentagram. It's strictly a cash and carry operation.
8 It says right there in the field manual: seeing a few rainbow bumper stickers in the windows of a couple of bars on the other side of town constitutes a militarized zone.
9 i.e. God is not beige.
10 All you LGBT Christians that are nodding right now, stop it. He doesn't mean you. Even if that's exactly what you've been doing.
11 Years of laboratory testing on heterosexual rats have confirmed this
12 Ditto
13 Rainbows don't make gay leprechauns real either (always after me Lucky Charms…)
14 Conversations like, what, exactly? "You're right. Your use of the rainbow is so much more meaningful than ours. Can you help us pick out a new symbol that's less inclusive and more drenched with shame-y?"
Labels: christist watch, gay culture
DANCER
Today's gay film was the Phillipine
A 15 year old boy/man visits a gay dancer bar on a quiet afternoon and arranges to "date" one of the beautiful boy/man dancers.
The boy is middle class the dancer is not. He is a prostitute with a little gilding on the scene.
Nevertheless, a kind of affection ensues (the dancer does not collect his money) and the boy gets a good dose of social science along with a quite beautiful sexual experience. His first. The best it could be.
He asks the dancer to take him home afterward and gets to see the kind of poverty that drives a beautiful young man into the skin trade.
A delicate mix of homoerotic, very sweet, and a bit of social consciousness is well told and safe to watch in that nothing bad happens. It has already happened with the arbitrary circumstances that "chose" each boy to have a different life experience.
Optimistically, we can see that the boundaries can be crossed by affection and even a kind of love. Or pessimistically, we can see that the die is cast and each will end up in their own caste at the end.
Any mild hope that these kids will ever get together is pretty well dashed. It is just too difficult.
This is a wise film and the proceedings are quite enjoyable.
The cast is made up of "real" drag queens, macho dancers, assorted bar denizens and the like. It feels like the real thing because it is.
I will give this a 4 out of Netflix5.
Friday, April 20, 2012
EARTH DAY
Things like Earth Day, Sunday, are just some more pious bullshit that feels good but doesn't do one fucking thing for the environment.
From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE BLOG
Things I Pledge to Do for Mother Earth
Sunday is the 42nd Earth Day, a worldwide event we celebrate every year to remind ourselves that we're the biggest parasites on the third rock from the sun. To mark the occasion, this year I pledge to…
Change the channel any time one of those dishonest oil company commercials claiming environmental responsibility comes on.
Save water in my house by doing laundry at my neighbors' house while they're at work.
Rent a chopper and drop thousands of large plastic bins over the city to remind people that Portland recycles.
Fart only on odd-numbered days. (This one'll be tough. I may need to attend support group meetings.)
Retrofit the car with hybrid technology so it only runs on gas when the team of kittens gets too tired to pull it.
Use only the sun and a magnifying glass to light up my bong. Er…uh…"water pipe."
Restrict my use of "fracking" to its handiness as an adjective paired with the word "idiots" to describe people who displease me.
Contribute to healthy forests by teaching tea partiers that watering trees with the blood of tyrants actually kills them. Fracking idiots.
Help save the whales by hiding as many as I can in the basement washtub.
Close down tar sands sites by making spooky noises so the owners think they're haunted and run away.
Embrace chamberpot technology.
Dispose of my spent fuel rods properly instead of selling them as glowsticks at raves.
Start a coral reef in my bathtub for eventual relocation off the Florida coast.
Labels: bullshit, environment, holidays
MCAIN TOURS ROMNEY AROUND ARIZONA TODAY
I wonder if they talked about any of this.
Arizona is now considered a possible Obama state. Too much twaddling with immigration and that awful whack job governor.
Too funny.
And McCain obviously relishes his lines.
Labels: McCain, republican whack jobs, Romney
THE ANATOMY OF DESIRE
Today's movie was the Mexican
El Cielo Dividido / Broken Sky (2006)
A splendid display of show don't tell.
Dialog is minimal as two young men fall in love and explore their new relationship in depth. The sex is plentiful and we catch it all. But it is sex that is all over. Total. Deeply erotic because of the love that goes in it. Perhaps infatuation but what the hell.
The story is simple. Boy meets boy. Boys fall in love. Boy's attention wanders, small hurts grow, alienation, boys part, after awhile the original love breaks through and they reconcile.
That is it.
This film is interesting because it does not have any anti gay stuff in it. These guys live in an ideal world where open affection and all the rest goes unhindered.
This sounds funny but there are no cell phones. There is no interference from college. It is just, plain and simply a love story.
Now. The thing is that it is fundamentally a silent film and everything is told with closeup, expression, body angles, atmosphere and color, design, visual thing after visual thing.
It is glorious to watch.
There is some anxiety over whether they are being foolish to give each other up, over whether something "bad" will happen. Only emotional "badness".
I would say that this is an extraordinary piece of work.
Incidentally, it is not even vaguely sexy most of the time in the porn sense.
It is extremely sexy in the sense that attraction is deconstructed and reconstructed. No touch or kiss unturned.
Gotta see it to get it.
I think it is a 5 out of Netflix5. I might even buy it.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
STILL
You know he couldn't sing for ten years, Cancer. And the treatments.
Then the voice came back for long enough to have a second career.
Labels: music
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
LUMP IN THROAT
I have to admit that I felt a bit sad to see the space shuttle coming "home" for it's final resting place,
I have not been much of a fan for the space stuff. I know it is probably important but it doesn't stir me up much.
But I guess it is more under my skin than I thought.
Look at this photo. Imagine standing where those guys are watching the return to the Smithsonian Air Museum.
MINIPOSTS
Blood tests back from the doc. All OK, especially the PSA. It has been the same for a very long time.
In the office he showed me his little handwritten note with all the PSAs that I have had in 16 years. When I came to him I had just had the radiation and I was also seeing a radiologist but that ended very quickly when Dr. Jim and I both determined that it wasn't necessary. I don't like too much doctoring and Dr. Jim is just the man for me.
There was one sort of dissonant note in a kidney test, Happens every year. I am not drinking enough water.
OK, I can do that.
Haircut today. I don't much like to go but I like the results.
The place I go is pretty low key. No performing seals or hype. The feeling is that I am basically alone with my cutter. He says "dresser". Outside there is a big lawn with chairs and shit and there are a lot of people hanging out. I really don't like that. Remember the introvert reaction to this kind of thing.
And always, always there is someone I know screaming out my name.
Every one turns and looks and stares.
I go to the person as quickly as I can because I don't want any more attention. I say hello, give a hug, take the admiration for the new haircut and get the fuck out of there as soon as I can.
John loves this place. It is so, well, social. So nice.
Not for me. It is a snake pit. I do like seeing my friends there though if they just wouldn't scream my name out.
Polls are out and mostly it shows that Romney and Obama are running neck and neck. In April.
My friends are distraught. What world do they live in?
We knew it would be close. The Obamas said that from the beginning.
More comforting to know that there is a traditional nomination bump.
What have people heard for the last months? Obama the socialist, the evil bastard, the incompetent. While he has no target. Now he does though. I am pretty sure that he is going to kick the Mitter's ass.
NIiknames. My friends also have a variety of names for Romney but we need something better than we have. Mittens is funny, a smirk. Pretty Boy is a bit nasty. Little Lord Flauntleroy.
Most people pick up on his prissiness and disconnections. He has the lowest likability rating of any candidate since the polling began for this.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
LIVE ON THIS STAGE
I am anything but a rap fan although I love the show they put on.
Now, at our very own main event, Coachella, we have the resurrection of Tupac with my old friend Snoop.
They call it a hologram but it isn't. It is a projected image onto the floor and a bounce over to a mylar panel. Nevertheless, awesome, and the hit of the Festival.
Read about it here.
Rapper's De-Light: Tupac 'Hologram' May Go on Tour
It just makes me smile. I avoid the music but love the hype. And, actually, somehow Tupac's routine is still riveting.
See for yourself.
The crowd is stunned at the beginning. Me too.
Snoop comes on about 2:30.
Labels: fun. music
WE AREN'T ALL THAT DIFFERENT
Kevin Drum fesses up to his obsession with the George W Bush National Guard story.
How long ago was that?
Today, Kev brings it all up again because someone else has and his starter got wound up.
Bush National Guard Story Lives
Take a look at the comments. Full of the same kind of trivial conspiracy rehash that we went through in 2000.
This is a lot like the Republican whack jobs I love to mock.
Look. A lot of guys used the National Guard to hide out in the Viet era.
Before that a lot of guys used ROTC and other programs too do the same thing. The Reserves.
I have a story as good as Georgies as it happens. It is just that I didn't run for President or anything else that looked into my dereliction of duty.
I managed to scam my way out of going to the Berlin crisis.
Am I contrite about it? Do I feel bad? No.
No one was dying in that scrape at all but two years of career and family going down the shitter wasn't worth it. Period.
Bush did his slipping when the 'Nam thing was turning down.
I know. There are grades of malingering but he didn't have a monopoly on it by any means.
Labels: bushie, democratic whack jobs, republican whack jobs
INSIDE OUT
Today's gay film was the Danish
A NYTimes Critics' Pick.
A young military officer quits the service as he is accused of making advances to a couple of his soldiers.
In anger and rebellion, he connects with a right wing, Nazi oriented bunch of guys who mug gay men and attack muslim immigrants.
What was he thinking?
In the "brotherhood" he encounters a guy who is in the same boat.
This is the closet strategy of becoming a violent homophobe to hide your own desires. Look it up. It is pretty much the same idea that for every hater there is a smaller hatee inside.
The two men are attracted to one another, fall into lust with each other and then love.
Complications ensue.
This is a violent film with a strong message. It is, at times, hard to watch. The performances are strong and its kind of documentary quality of "you are there" keeps one at the edge of the seat. We know that their denial is paper thin and that doom is is just around the corner.
And it is a film to be seen.
I would put it in the category of a 4 out of Netflix5.
Monday, April 16, 2012
AMAZING BUT TRUE
Congressional Republicans, those sterling characters who have done so well for us so far in this session don't want Romney to get into the act. After all, he is just the Prexy Nom.
G.O.P. Lawmakers and Romney Face a Delicate Tango
I was astonished to see this.
At the very least one would expect them to at least pretend that they take him seriously as a leader.
No. They do not.
How can we read this?
One way is to see that they don't think he will be elected either and they are not about to give control or show any sign of moving off their so called "positions".
Which is really no dice.
The Rom has already called the Ryan budget "marvelous" so they stuck him with that.
It really seems to be a mess, huh?
They couldn't even decide on lunch.
Labels: republican whack jobs, Romney
MINIMAL CONNECTION
I recently read something where they referred to the way men often greet each other non-verbally.
A nod. Upswing of the chin, eye contact and the chin stays up just a bit before it returns to the original position.
I have seen this. I have noticed it. I, in fact, do it.
I may have been doing this most of my life but never consciously.
A cultural non-verbal.
Do you know about this? Do you see it? Do you do it?
There is also something of an eye thing. Here is where straight and gay men differ.
Straight men nod. Period. "The gays" say something else, quickly. Are you? And if not will you anyway?
Once you start to deconstruct the nod it becomes way more complicated.
Do straight men know about the little gay twist? Probably not because they do not respond to it. The way to respond would be to stop or smile or wave your hand or pass and then turn. But the wait and turn is more blatant and cruisey. Faggot!
Incidentally, women do not do this. Period. They do nothing in the way of a nod or a hello unless they know you from a safe interaction.
There is a guy who comes to the gym, has been for awhile. He is a blank slate but handsome. Very. Quite hot. I admit to a mild crush.
I made it a point to say hello to him as he was close enough to my cardio spot to do so.
He looked a bit shocked that someone broke through the wall but he was nice and, well, nodded.
He speaks to no one. No one speaks to him except for a couple of girls who come from time to time.
He is part of the troupe of gym people who started at my Golds when the 24 Hour Fitness bellied up.
He doesn't even acknowledge them. Except the two girls.
Once I did the hello I would see him and give a small wave. Very small. He would do the nod. And he does it so well.
Now I nod too.
So I studied this and notice that everyone does it. Sort of.
This is how I got interested in all this as when I read about the nod, I was in the middle of a nodding, and nothing else, relationship.
Men are funny, no?
Labels: non-verbals
WHO'S ON FIRST?
Today's gay film was the film noir of Pedro Almodovar
La mala educación / Bad Education (2004)
with one of my favorites, Gael García Bernal who plays three roles, locked in each. No pour over. Clear separation. Well, with the help of a little makeup.
This is a film which is all homo all the time without being queer about it.
You figure it out.
Actually while we are figuring it out we don't get to think too much about what we are seeing on that plane. There is some great skin and very skillful acting by all the cast who are also thrown into three distinct time periods which go around and come around as the core story gets told, retold, and told again.
Yeh. I am not telling you a thing. No spoilers. And everything is a spoiler.
This is very high art gay filming. But then that is who Almodovar is. A high concept gay man.
I have seen this film three times and each time I get something different out of it. I also get lost in the story and "forget" what I saw last time.
I loved the front titles. Bang!
The word "masterpiece" rolls around a lot of reviews of this film. I agree.
A 5 out of Netflix5.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
NEW FRIENDS
Today's gay film was
A gay man's best friend has just been killed in an auto accident.
Taking over his effects and unfinished business, he discovers an on-line relationship with an Italian man who, as it happens, is planning to come to Dallas for a visit.
After some online back and forth, it is decided that the Italian friend will come anyway as he has bought his ticket.
The two survivors meet and, in two days, strike a relationship that is between the two of them, aside from their common loss of the deceased.
Slow and easy film with a lot of talking and reflection about life, death, relationships.
And, the relationship that they are forging with one another.
Nothing is decided, not too much is revealed but both gain great benefit from the the two sides they saw of their dead friend and then what they see in each other.
Modest goals, well achieved.
Beautiful men, inside and out.
I saw this before and enjoyed it, now once again. That makes it a 5. It is very likable. This kind of film is always worth seeing several times. There are subtleties that cannot be taken in with only one viewing. Mostly because the director has chosen a strategy to show rather than tell.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
GOOD TIMES
I have been busy.
Thursday, we had our friends from the east for dinner and a visit. Four hours more or less.
Had not seen them in 16 years.
They got here and it was as though we had been doing this together all along. Very nice.
We switched the house cleaning day from Friday to Thursday morning and I spent most of the day getting things together for dinner and all. Chicken Salad ala Waldorf, a specialty of the house. My invention, sort of. A lot of places are copying it now! I can even find a photo on Google images.
Booker was a big hit as always. He is the soul of the house now and knows it.
Yesterday, I wrote some checks and realized that it was a Friday the Thirteenth. I don't believe in the bad luck stuff but I did mess the check up and had to void it.
But overall, we had the best time we could and it was all smooth sailing so no bad luck really arrived.
Labels: life
GENERATION GAP
Today's gay film was Visconti's
The Thomas Mann novel translated into a beautiful visualization starring Dirk Bogarde.
Gustav Von Aschenbach meets Tadzio.
Well, they never meet. Aschenbach stalks him and the kid responds. A flirter who knows what he is doing.
Look. This is not actually a gay movie it is really about obsession, a twist of pedophilia and just a bit of teen age flirting. But it is the most gay film you are likely to see as a full length feature. Everything is queer.
Gay history reveals that a lot of films were blatantly gay and somehow passed. I think here it is saved because it was written by Mann, also a closet case, and produced by Visconti.
It is totally gorgeous and the music is all Mahler.
First class.
A 5 out of Netflix5.
Friday, April 13, 2012
OR TREAT?
Today's gay favorite film #11 was
TRICK (1999)Two young men notice each other in a go-go gay bar. One is the go-go boy of the hour.
By chance, they are both on the same train going home. We are in NYC where everyone sees everyone else every day on the train.
I don't mean to be dismissive about this. The film is a small town romance that could not happen in a small town.
The boys agree to trick with one another. A one night stand.
Problem, they have nowhere to go and undergo a series of sometimes terminally irritating delays and side trips. The necessary tension.
One remarks toward the end that they have already done the hard part of courtship. Former lovers, catty drag queens, really really irritating best friends (Tori Fucking Spelling)
But somehow they, and we, get through it all and each young man is transformed.
Both are shy and have found behaviors to overcome it. Failed tactics. The go go boy is hard and apparently promiscuous, the aspiring writer is self deprecating and almost masochistic in his failure to assert.
By the end of their trial by fire, they traverse the spectrum of meeting up. The quiet one takes an intiiative and the ballsy one quiets down and gets sweet and soft.
It is great to see and was, for me, reward for staying with the difficulties. I was with them all the way.
It is a favorite, I think, because it shows young men not doing the hit and run thing and more importantly, using their attraction for one another as a catalyst for changing their usual behavior.
At least a 4 out of Netflix5. I had seen it before and it was still fresh. And sexy.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
LITTLE POSTS
I went to Doctor Jim today for my semiannual checkup. This is not the big on with the EKG. It is mostly a finger job for my prostate cancer. Even after 16 years. Twice a year. Also a PSA.
He also does other touchy feely stuff. A blood pressure. There will be some lab tests on top of the PSA. Tomorrow. So far so good. I told him about my goal of living until 90. He says 93 would be a better guess and that only because it is his experience that even the long lived begin to fall apart after that. That said, he has several 90+ year olds and they haven't started on the feeble thing yet.
Incidentally, if you think that time passes more quickly as you get older, you are right and the 90s claim it has continued to speed onward.
That means that the fast living people live longer or is it the other way around. The longer you live the faster you are.
Never mind.
I got my 2011 tax returns from my accountant today.
I don't have to pay any tax because they owe me money.
Oddly, or not, it feels like I don't owe them anything. That I am home free.
Even if it is my money that they have. I already paid it.
It is the old funny thing.
This goes right along with the people who have their tax withheld and hope to get a refund. They are so happy! A gift!
Never mind that they have already paid that money and got no interest on it.
But the illusion of a bonus somehow makes them happy.
It just shows how accessible happiness really is if you strike the right attitude. Even if it is based on an illusion.
The weather has gone to shit here just as my ex-business partner is here to play some golf. We are seeing them tomorrow for dinner.
It shows how long I have been here that I actually care that they get the right impression of how great the weather is here compared to Florida where they have chosen to retire. Where summers are unlivable at the humidity at any temperature. Dew point disasters.
It is the old sun-spot rivalry. Our heat is better than yours.
We don't have heat this week. In fact they are predicting 3-6 inches of snow on the mountains above 5000 feet.
Well, they don't have THAT in Florida.
But there were a bunch of rainbows this morning. That rain and sun type of rain. Showers just making it over the mountain on the west while the sun rises in, well where else, in the east.
Labels: finance, health, weather
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
SOMETHING HAPPENED
Todays gay film is Number 12 on the 5) Favorite list. gregg Araki's masterpiece
The bad boy grows up in this film which is coherent, touching, suspenseful and a whole lot more.
Two boys are connected by their experience with a child molester. Not an easy subject. But Araki wrestles it to the ground and keeps us on it until it is resolved. That is not a spoiler but it is important to know that this is an affirmation of human kindness in the face of human evil.
Very optimistic.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt is a gay hustler who remembers what happened and suffers because of this knowledge. Brady Corbet does not remember what happened and suffers because he has covered it up under a space alien cover story. Suppression.
After a long period of searching, growing up and trying to the erase the past, the boys meet and as Gordon Levitt promises, clear it all up in 20 minutes. Or have a start at it. Tender, healing.
This is a 5 out of Netflix5 for me. I have seen it before. And I will see it again.
Gordon-Levitt was a child actor in Third Rock From the Sun, another alien. I don't know if this was an inside joke in the casting of the film but it would work if it was.
Monday, April 09, 2012
ALIENATED YOUTH
Today's gay film was Gregg Araki's
Teen agers this time done in a stew of short vignettes many of which involve YouTube type videos by the "kids".
All of them gay. Some are partners. Two are lesbians who get many of the good lines.
There is a story arc that begins in the second quarter of the film. Araki helps with an arrow drawn over the action that says "narrative starts here".
Given the state of urban adolescence, I suspect that these kids aren't any more fucked up than straight kids. After all, they are urban and critical mass dictates there are enough other gay kids around to connect with.
There is not one adult in this film, at least not seen visually.
There is some sex. There are older sexual predators.
This film is very raw. I mean that in the sense of traditional film "rules". But it quite immediate and available. Kids are, after all, rather obvious. Green in the art of obfuscation, rationalization and complication.
I liked it a lot but wouldn't want to see it again as it is like its protagonists, shallow and, take away the jump cuts, a little boring sometimes.
I will give it a 3 out of Netflix5.
Sunday, April 08, 2012
JAMES
Not so secret esrose crush revealed.
They say the hair is for a film where he is a drug dealer.
I don't care what it is for. It is the shit!
Labels: films, fun. music
ARAKI ONE
Today's gay film is one of four that I am seeing written and directed by Gregg Araki. The fourth in line will be a 50 Favorite Gay film but today is his first film.
"An irresponsible film by Gregg Araki" on the titles
Araki is/was transgressive..
Was in that people have caught up with him. Now he is making more conventional but slightly skewed films. He has not lost his edge, just found a way to incorporate it in more conventional surroundings.
This one is a road/buddy movie. Two gay men, HIV positive, fall in love after meeting not-cute-at-all.
The review at the link above is the best rundown I have seen.
My own reaction is very positive. I have seen this before. What is not to like? It has the underlying sadness of HIV but, as one of the boys says, that allows a lot of play on top of the fatalism. There are some very funny scenes.
His style is scene, scene, scene, all straight cuts, bang. Nothing goes on very long. It is a very efficient scenario. Bang, bang, bang.
The guys are beautiful to look at, the sex is straight forward, nice and not in your face. Sexy. That relieves the starkness too.
I would see it again in a minute. It is great to watch.
This film was made for so little money it is simply amazing. Araki wrote, directed and photographed. It is his film all the way. Auteur.
What else? Thrills, laughs, chills, comedy. What else could we ask for? A 5 out of Netflix5.
RAMPING UP
We are having guests for dinner Thursday night, my former business partner and his wife. We haven't seen them in 14 or 15 years. I have kept up with him by email. Not the same as eye to eye.
They are here for golf somewhere nearby and will be coming here for dinner.
It is amazing how visitors can stimulate the fixup and cleanup activities.
It started to happen today by cleaning the fountain. Actually, I would probably clean it today anyway. Silt and algae.
The silt is from the air. Blowing dust. Silica. A bit disarming given that our lungs are getting the same fallout.
We will clean the house a day early and do some other stuff.
This is the kind of thing that no one who visits notices but, since we do, the impact is considerable on the quality of the visit.
This is somewhere else but it is a great picture.
Saturday, April 07, 2012
GAY CANCER
Today's Favorite Gay Film # 13 was
in which we follow a group of gay men and Mary Louise Parker for the ten years after the first appearance of HIV, a small news item inside the NYTimes about a gay cancer.
People get sick and die (in those days it was a death sentence) and some people simply disappear. Others steer the ship with great spiritual power.
I came out (again) in 1973 and until 1981 had no clue about the future.
I remember reading the item in the NYT and wondering what it meant for me.
I lost a lot of friends. I worried a lot about the men I had been with who became positive.
The world changed.
Over the years I have seen the disease modify and become treatable. But with substantial risk because of the sometime lethal side effects.
This film puts faces into the headlines and medical stuff.
These are people like the ones I know and knew who lived with the disease for awhile or even up to this day.
The power of the film is that it does not show homosexuals or homosexual, then gradually gay, life. It is in the close up depiction of the realities of the disease and the loved ones who were affected. Most of the cast, one way or another.
I saw it when it came out and I am glad that I was able to see it again. A 5 out of Netflix5.
Friday, April 06, 2012
HE-SWANS
Today's gay film is not a film but a film of a ballet
Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake (1995)
And it isn't a classical ballet either but rather modern dance.
And it is gay gay gay. And good for Matthew Bourne.
In this version of the famous and boring ballet the swans are men and the Prince falls for the head swan.
This has resonance for us partly because it is this dance that the mature, trained dancer Billy Elliot appears in at the end of the film. Spoiler but if you haven't seen Billy Elliot yet you are not likely to and to hell with it.
Why is this gay? Well, first of all, as Oscar Levant, a famous wit of the last century, said, "Ballet is the fairy's baseball". A favorite line.
Second, these swans are all bare above the feathers.
Three, and probably most important artistically, the Prince is a closet case, conflicted over his sexuality and the whole thing is a metaphor of his struggle. There is also a nice swing at the homophobia ball here and it connects.
It is a great show and very much worth seeing. Sometimes funny, sometimes tragic, always witty and the music is gorgeous. All Tchaikovsky of course.
If I die without seeing enough of anything, it will be live ballet.
When I was in high school, I went to the New York State Theater to see the NYC ballet whenever I was in NYC and had the time and when they were in season. Ballanchine. Then I added other companies.
But look at the odds of seeing them. In NYC. In season. Had the time.
Since then I try every opportunity. But now I live in the hinterlands. No ballet here that I want to see.
I went to a touring production of The Corsair but it was lacking. A made up Russian company.
So this DVD was a very special experience. It is very well produced and the people are all very talented. It is a 5 already as I have seen it several times.
Thursday, April 05, 2012
VULNERABLE AND OPEN
Today's gay film was
Surprisingly sweet. Funny and sweet. Sexy and sweet.
This is not a film version of the stage show which has been an international sensation. It is a film, cast for the film, filmed in pieces and with very close in photography. Steady cam. There is an audience but it is not a regular audience. More like actors.
I am grateful for this decision to make it a film film. The closeups allow a totally other approach. No. They do not have closeups of dicks. The dicks are the least of it. It has to do with nudity.
The songs are really heart felt. There are some joke songs but some heavy ballads.
The actors were selected for ensemble as well as individual talent. According to the "Making of" feature none of these boys had performed naked, they all hung together for this, so to speak.
It is a wonderful production.
I have seen it before but that didn't get in the way (oh so boring), in fact it enhanced the experience.
I think this is/was very difficult to do but they brought it off. I do not usually watch the "making of" but in this case it is worth the time. An hour. But all that went into it is displayed as well as the trouble and arguments.
A sure 5 out of Netflix5. I would actually think that seeing a live production would be very different.
OVER HEATED
The electric oven wouldn't work yesterday. We called. The guy came.
It is the heat sensor.
I like these guys. They have so much experience. When I said that it didn't work and we saw the flasher F3, he knew it was the sensor.
I said that I had just cleaned the oven. He stopped me. "Say no more".
"You should never use the oven self clean".
Too hot. 500-600 F. Too long. Up to six hours. Mine is 4.5. It fries the circuits or oven parts.
I asked how to clean then.
He took a rag and showed me a wiping motion on the counter. "Do this with oven cleaner on the rag". And he changed hands.
Here is another way to do it. Same motion, different hand.
Oh. I got it.
The new oven sensor comes tomorrow.
Never too old to learn something.
Labels: housekeeping
Wednesday, April 04, 2012
ABOUT TIME
Finally stating the obvious
Doctor Panels Recommend Fewer Tests for Patients
I have a friend who has had a rising PSA, meaning that he is on the lookout for prostate cancer.
He panicked. He went to this doctor and that to get a second opinion. He finally found a doc who would recommend a full MRI body scan to see if there was any cancer in his body.
The results were indeterminate because that procedure will not really reveal prostate cancer cells or the degree to which the cells have matured. The Gleason Number.
He and they skipped the simple biopsy which is, actually, not indicated until there are several PSA risings. An easy and not very uncomfortable test.
Now, he has decided he is cancer free. Even though the unnecessary test which is very costly is not a valid test for the suspected disease.
This is crazy. But a doc saw him coming and gave him what he wanted and told him what he wanted to hear.
This is going on all the time.
I don't do tests. I don't go to a doc who is afraid to practice the art of medicine on me and will not ask for tests that are unnecessary nor will he send me to a shop where the docs are known for extra testing.
I have never had a number of the tests that many people have had on the chance that they are sick.
But I was brought up this way. Most medical symptoms will pass. A doctor is someone to work with.
I believe that many tests which are invasive (colonoscopies you can get wholesale here) should be conducted without a reason to do so with prior simpler approaches.
Of course, we all like to see our biases justified. But this is a whole gaggle of responsible physicians and professional boards who represent their interests.
Tuesday, April 03, 2012
SHORT STORIES
Today's gay film was four shorts.
Four totally different films. Two gay men are confronted with gay bashers with baseball bats. Surprises unfold.
A young gay man working on a family farm finds a buried message from the past.
A teenager and his several gay friends go to a disco. Hollywood. Wonderfully sweet.
A father and son drive to the RR station and have a conversation that is so awkward and yet so revealing to us that it is painful to witness.
There are several BL films in the can and we will be seeing all of them.
I saw the first one many years ago and it was great but then I lost contact with them.
This film clip is a bit of a spoiler so you decide. It is the second half.
I would actually like to see this again but I probably won't make the effort. I will give it a 4 out of Netflix5.
DAYDREAMING
I have had a lot of time on my hands in the last week. I don't know why. I am doing all the usual stuff.
Well, a few of my friends that I meet with regularly are away or working on stuff to get back together again and work on. Two tomorrow.
It is so unusual that I got a little panicked. But I just relaxed and let it go.
Stuff turned up to do or read or just sit and think about.
Nothing consequential. No great insights. Just very enjoyable.
I don't think that I allow myself enough daydream time. I think that I will do more of it. After all, it is an old man's prerogative.
A sort of meditation. Doing nothing. Pretty good.
I am not a stranger to this mode of course. I just haven't taken the opportunity or made time for it.
Labels: life, meditation, spiritual life
TO EAR IS HUMAN AND CANINE
Five days after we took out Booker's stitches the same ear got the same hematoma again.
I will not drag you through the upset of the operation, the bandages, the fucking cone.
We went to see the Doc on Friday. It was OK. If I had written a script for her on how to play this meeting she did it letter perfect.
And, we were very disappointed.
We had arrived with the decision that we were not going to go through all that shit again. If we did anything we would have her drain the ear and hope for the best.
All through this we have been in touch with Booker's Aunt Rusty who has handled more Airedales than we would even guess she has. Hundreds?
The hematoma is common enough that she has drained some of them herself. She has seen a few quilt stitch deals like Bookers and thinks the procedure is unreliable. Now we know it is.
She has told us that she never tries draining if the hematoma comes back. The worse that can happen is a kind of thickened part of the ear. Cauliflower but not really.
So, despite the Vet's recommendation that we drain and tape his ear down so it, well, something, we have decided to do nothing.
He is not in pain. He probably will not be. He sleeps on it.
He may not be perfectly pretty. But already I don't notice it.
He is getting on. I have scars. So might he.
If it turns bad we will reconsider but no more of the cone, the discomfort.
Surgeons always want to cut. It is prudent to really wait to see if something is life or death, then yes, operate. Or possibly will cure itself or have an acceptable outcome. Don't operate.
Once this was decided, we felt clean and easy all over again.
Labels: Booker
Monday, April 02, 2012
TURNING POINTS
Today's 50 Favorite Gay Films Number 14
starring its writer and director Harvey Fierstein with Matthew Broderick, Anne Bancroft and Brian Kerwin.
This is the smash hit four hour play done in two hours and while a bit rushed, it is great job of capturing the wide scope of the play. Twenty years in the life of the drag queen Arnold on the stage and off and his partners. Along the way the film hits a lot of then far off ideals, gay marriage, gay adoption gay rights. This film was/is way ahead of its times.
Coming out and gaining acceptance from parents is a big part of this. Bancroft as the mother tears up some scenery but holds onto her biases to the end. Through her we can see all the pain between mother and son and back again.
The drag sequences and Arnold's working friends (including the long time star of the circuit, Charles Pierce) are really great to watch both backstage and on.
I enjoyed seeing it. I never did.
Once is enough. A 3 out of Netflix5. It is good but once does the trick I think.
Sunday, April 01, 2012
FEVER DREAM
Today's gay film was
Ubania (2000)Dan Futterman in an odd but refreshing story based on urban legends with a gay twist which turns out to be puzzling and occasionally time warped. You get to find your way. A true "indie" original.
Unlike many films of this type there are no twinks, no gratuitous sex or sexiness. Mostly gritty and hard. In a way, it shows urban legends as reality and in the same way Futterman is looking for his reality and the acceptance to move ahead with his life.
BY THE NUMBERS
I love this.
A Quantum Theory of Mitt Romney
A bit of context. Before Mitt Romney, those seeking the presidency operated under the laws of so-called classical politics, laws still followed by traditional campaigners like Newt Gingrich. Under these Newtonian principles, a candidate’s position on an issue tends to stay at rest until an outside force — the Tea Party, say, or a six-figure credit line at Tiffany — compels him to alter his stance, at a speed commensurate with the size of the force (usually large) and in inverse proportion to the depth of his beliefs (invariably negligible). This alteration, framed as a positive by the candidate, then provokes an equal but opposite reaction among his rivals.He then goes on to explain how each of several concepts apply to the Romney campaign.But the Romney candidacy represents literally a quantum leap forward. It is governed by rules that are bizarre and appear to go against everyday experience and common sense. To be honest, even people like Mr. Fehrnstrom who are experts in Mitt Romney’s reality, or “Romneality,” seem bewildered by its implications; and any person who tells you he or she truly “understands” Mitt Romney is either lying or a corporation.
This is great. If you don't know much about quantum mechanics you can still get it. If you do have the Q then it is LOL all the way.
Labels: Romney
MOST IMPORTANT DAY EVAH'!
When I first came out in 1973 or 74, it was difficult to meet people.
There were the standard meeting places of course. The bars, the bushes and the baths.
I was afraid of all three.
So what to do?
I began to go to gay rights meetings. Planning parades and shit. Discussion groups. And the best, an institution which had a hot line, medical services for gays, counselling and, as it turns out, its own AA Meeting. But that is another story although less than five years later, I would be an attendee at that daily noon Meeting.
I also ended up on the Board in later years.
None of these approaches were very profitable. Politics and sex don't mix no matter what you read. At least not for a timid, just out of the closet man who has family and business obligations.
Time. I needed time.
As it turned out, the most abundant source for meeting people, then as well as now, were the personal ads.
We didn't have the support of the internet then. Personal ads appeared in the "free" papers which were everywhere in those days. Personal ads were a huge part of the revenue for these papers. The revolution was on and everyone wanted the dish on the latest whatever. So distribution was good.
I began to answer other people's ads and actually met a boyfriend. Another late bloomer like me, Mort (he originally said his name was Mark). We saw each other for a year or more and had a good time. He was a nice man with the longest abdomen I ever saw. Or felt. A record holder. But I digress.
Eventually, the relationship with Mark, as convenient as it was, had limitations.
He lived with a woman so it was always my place or a hotel.
He was terrified of being outed. He was an Art History professor at a local university. He did not want a gay life. I have often said that I never met a successful bi-sexual. By that I mean one who can work both sides of the street. Mark's choice was to live with his female mate and work the ads, the street, the bars. A half gay life. Not for me. The whole thing about going to his place was impossible. It freaked me out. Their bed and all. I only went once.
I decided this was not going to work out. It wasn't working out. Doomed.
So I decided to write my own personal ad.
It worked like this. You would place an ad in a paper and then wait until replies showed up in your mailbox at the paper office. You would open your mail and read it (please enclose a photo) and make a choice about the next step. I didn't get many photos. Blind dates. Usually the photo was a killer. I decided to never send a photo.
Often, no next step. Frogs no princes, weirdos, impossible setups. But in every batch there would be a temporary prince, a quick sexual exploration or, sometimes, even two or three dates.
On the third or fourth drop of the hook into the pond, I got a call. Well after the time the ad expired. A last minute letter in the mailbox. I almost missed it as the rental term was due to run out.
A smart ass kind of letter from a guy who worked in City Hall. A sort of off hand answer to my RSVP. I liked the handwriting.
I remember a sort of "try me if you will" kind of line which sounded a bit brazen and challenging.
John. No last names please.
I called him.
It was a weird call. Quick and, aha, dirty. I found out later that he was on his way to lunch and was trying to take my call and get out of work at the same time.
We did talk.
And agreed to meet for a drink at a bar in the steaming kettle building, second floor, after his work. Peter's Plum.
Meet at the lollypop sign at the T at five.
I can tell you now that the afternoon was very long. There was something different about this one and I was quite nervous.
I went to the appointed lamp post awhile before five. Always early. Scanning the City Hall Plaza for the man. There was a signal but I forget what it was.
But I didn't need a sign. I could see him. Just the kind of man who would write such a letter, be flip and quick on the phone and also quick on the uptake.
There he was. Gasp. Halfway across the Plaza. My god! I could pick him out in this swarming mass of city employees escaping their jobs.
We went upstairs for a drink. More or less empty. We sat at an antiqued table. And gaped at one another. I remember the gaping.
I don't know how long it took to invite him to my apartment to see my etchings but, as I recall, I didn't finish my drink. Not likely in those days. I would probably have had two drinks under different circumstances.
He said yes, with this, now patented, leer. I could see without closer examination that he was OK, safe. He was fun to be with. He had one of the best bodies I had been on so far although Mort was pretty good. What else was there to wait for?
We went in the back door of the apartment building. Past the trash masher. Never forgiven for that, I might add.
We got in the elevator and I am pretty sure we were on each other as soon as the door closed. Up to the third floor studio and in the door and now we will show a montage of crashing waves, roaring horses and a summer storm.
It was about this time actually. Too early for a summer storm.
I would like to say that the rest was history. Well, it was, but not that way.
We had a very rocky beginning but it never, ever got worse, always better. And better than that.
A lot had to happen for us to get to the point where we were together and that was that. Five years?
What fun. As painful as parts of that early time could be, it was always fun.
Two near middle aged gay men just out of the closet is not pretty. Teen age emotions wrapped around what had appeared to both of us as achieved positions in work and the rest of our lives before we met. Chaos.
But the loving return that healed all the wounds. Always. The loving return. A higher plane.
So. That is how we started what is now 37 years of married life.
It came upon us so quickly and with such force that we lost the date of when we met. We even got the year wrong at first. It took at least two years to date often and long enough to make anything stick.
So, when asked when our anniversary was/is we made up a date. April Fool's Day. 1975.
Happy anniversary John.
