Wednesday, September 07, 2011
WEIGHT
I am feeling the weight of being alone. I mean this in a good way.
I have been glad for the experience of "handling things" while John is in Italy but, at the same time, I am aware that just because someone is gone, there is the family life to continue. The dishes, the laundry, making the bed, walking the other half of the dog. Yes. There are those things.
But more, the space. Someone is not here. Booker reflects this nicely. He gets little mini-depressions. He knows that the morning walk isn't the way it is supposed to be. And so on.
I am the same way. The days have a piece missing.I had thought that I would have a lot of time and space being alone. That is not the case. I did add a few chores, pruning the hibiscus, cutting down the "garden" to the gravel. Getting ready for a new courtyard.
Anyway, there it is.
Maybe this means that I miss him. Busy work doesn't relieve that.
He goes back to Milan tomorrow from Cinque Terre and then leaves there Friday AM and is due back later Friday night.
