esrosedotblog

TALKING CURE

We are doing better with Franklin's absence.

We still want him back but the feelings are more muted, softer, sometimes actually sweet. Nice, funny memories.

We put a little vase with a white rose on the spot where we said goodbye. It really helps a lot. I go visit. Quick shots.

We just keep moving through "firsts".

Today was the first day of leaving for the gym without a goodbye pet, a return without looking for the boy to fool with and, when I came home from my Meeting, no one pushed open the garage door, big black nose sticking through waiting for the motor to stop. He would not go in there if the cars were running.

Stuff like that.

Someone visited. A regular. No dog spinning around and barking in welcome. Franklin was enthusiasm itself when it came to people who came to see him.

There is also the realization that we have to say goodbye to everyone we love, sooner or later. We just don't think or feel much about it until it happens.

Coupled with that is the realization that we don't get to know when the goodbye will occur.

A blessing really. What if we knew? What a hardship. How impossible to be completely and spontaneously with the beloved.

I hate that it was so sudden, so fast. I am, at the same time, grateful that it was not slow and drawn out.

We began to see his problem a week ago today. Then, day by day, the curtains were drawn back to see the full gravity of his situation.

As quickly as the whole week went, we had enough time to say a full and wonderful goodbye with him.

We keep running into people who "haven't heard". There are still some more out there. That is OK. It is difficult to tell the story one more time but that is how we work stuff out. Outside. Talking.

Like this! So good to share it out.

Labels: Franklin