Saturday, April 11, 2009
LITTLE RITUALS, SMALL ROUTINES
Missing Franklin.
We went out for supper last night. It wasn't very good but it did break up the dinner-walk-play-out-by-the-spa routine. Bedtime was another reminder.
I decided to swim in the rituals and routines rather than resist.
We talked to him as we went to supper and saw a few fluffy clouds over the mountain. We had a good cry when no pup came to "bother" us at the spa.
We did take his things out of the house soon after he was gone. His bed space seemed very empty.
We decided to let his small overhead light on, the one we used as a night light for him and for us. It seems to be a nice sign that he was there and still is whenever we want to summon him.
I know this all might sound a bit corny but when one is in pain, corny can help. So can jokes. So can talking to the one who is gone.
There are bumps whenever there is something to do for or with Franklin that comes up.
No breakfast to put together this morning but I took "our" walk outside to look at the moon and the stars (he never did get where Orion was up there) and there was a full moon and a fluffy cloud. I decided we could still have a moment together even if one of us was not just there taking a pee or barking at something when he shouldn't at four in the morning.
John got up a while ago and we talked about him a bit. His soft belly was one element of it. He was great to pet but he wouldn't let you do too much before he would get busy about something else. Tough guy. Sweet guy.
So now we make the metaphorical ride out of Franklin land. We put the seat back up in the Jeep because he won't be going with us on this trip. I will take it in to get it washed this morning and get all those nose prints off the glass. A clean start.
We decided, more or less, that we would keep up the Sunday walk. Franklin memorial walk. It is good for us and there will be some sweet times remembering him and maybe we will see a fluffy cloud and have some short thoughts from him on the subject of things to sniff or kitties and other things to chase. We will resist the urge to run after them. That was his job.
Labels: Franklin