esrosedotblog

SOCIAL LYIN'

You know.

"I have a commitment that night".

That kind of lie.

Or, if it is an open house and you don't intend to go but no one will really notice, "Sure, thanks a lot".

I used to be an expert at this sort of thing.

I am a committed lifetime introvert.

I carry a membership card.

We take a pledge.

It involves standing in corners and not indulging in small talk ever. And leaving at the earliest possibility.

And those are the rules for if you have to go in the first place. The real emphasis is on creative fabrication of reasons not to attend.

But then,last year, I foolishly went off the reservation I gave my own party. This is actually OK for an introvert to do because you are sorta in charge and it is in your own house so you know where to hide.

The downside was that I had to start accepting some other invites of people who came to my place.

Don't get me wrong.

The rule of thumb pretty much holds that people who come to your party will not invite you to theirs, if any.

But a few will. The committed extroverts.

As a matter of fact, here they are.

And you know that they are all looking at YOU!

Last year I stumbled through more of other people's parties than I wanted to. I had fun at a couple but not in general.

This year I am rationing the invites out.

I will go to two affairs.

One is today and actually marks another milestone more than it does the holiday. I went to the same place last year. I know the layout and the plan. It is an open house.

Lots of leeway for escape and many many corners. Even some trees to hide behind.

Next Saturday we will go to our neighbor's house—the Dads to Franklin's best friend Bruno—for a prolonged buffet and small talk marathon.

I will go for awhile and then disappear.

I have their house cased out and know all the secret exits.

No one who will be there will be surprised at this, if they notice, nor will John have to explain.

That is what is nice about having a reputation. A repeat of last years' behavior is just more or less accepted. And all the closet introverts enviously give mental applause for an escape well carried out.

Labels: culture, holidays, Party