esrosedotblog

Good news for the grumps and grumblers among us.

Why it pays to be grumpy and bad tempered

This is my experience.

I grew up with a model for this kind of personality, my Dad.

He was a bit scary at times but you always knew where you stood. Or to put it more directly, I knew where I stood.

And I never doubted his love for me. Not one minute.

But he was a grump and a growler. He could get on a good rant.

This is the thing.

I grew up in a world that somehow honored "niceness" but, in the end rewarded the grump. My Dad won elections against nice guys, the sweet and caring ones. Me too.

But this needs to be parsed a bit. What some people would think is grumpy and mean, others would think of as honest.

A clear disservice to others not to say what we think.

Is that a sentence? Never mind goddam it.

See? Got you off that one didn't I?

Being grumpy does not mean that you can't also be a lovable person. A lovable bastard, perhaps, but still.

In my current life I sit on the condo board. A potential hot bed of anger, trouble, complaint and disquiet.

But we have no trouble. We have the most peaceful meetings I know of among condo board friends.

I think that is because we do not ban anger. We allow a bit of ranting. Finger pointing is good.

I have seen neighbors at war over a tree come in and go at each other. We let it go on. You can learn a lot by listening to a rant.

Once the energy is expended, then reasonable or at least acceptable solutions appear.

But stifle argument? War.

Labels: emotions