esrosedotblog

I was married and we had/have kids.

Everyone is grown up now. They are all doing fine as far as I can tell.

My wife would be as proud as I am. We were able to separate and still be good friends and parents.

I had the good fortune of finding another partner who understood and relished the experience of being a step-dad to a sizable brood.

I am not sure how my wife (the only wife I have ever had) carried this out. But these people seemed to have been able to do the same thing.

From Divorce, a Fractured Beauty

The unhappiness of day to day living is relieved with separation but new problems rise up. Antagonism, anger, revenge are all feelings that are likely to pop up and they do not yield pretty results.

I have seen kids' lives become a battleground for hating parents. So it started there. She and I agreed to be the best parents we could be.

That meant accepting things that perhaps we had thought we would not accept. Especially for her. But we/she/I did them. My partner, now husband, did them.

It is a long intimate and personal story but I can say this. It has a happy ending. Or an ending as happy as I could want it to be.

My wife became ill and died some time ago. She did not leave me with any regrets. Nor did I have any myself. I still grieve. And my eyes are wet.

It is nice to find other people who see that partnerships change in life but the people do not go away. If they do it is too bad and can't be helped. But if we can stay and adapt there is happiness just around the corner.

Labels: family