esrosedotblog

FODDER'S DAY

In a way, I am not interested in made-up commercial white bread middle class holidays.

Nonetheless, I always participated in the holidays when I was a son.

As a father, I am ambivalent.

On one hand, it does not matter to me. Every day is a dad-day for me.

My kids treat me special enough on a regular basis. I don't need added or compensatory attention.

On the other hand, I sort of sit and expect the phone call from each of them all day long.

One cannot ignore the inner insecurities that make us want even more attention than we already get.

Fortunately, none of my kids make a big deal about it.

There is no fuss.

It is just a phone call with a 'hi', a report of the day, and an 'I love you'.

The 'I love you' part is very important actually. As an orphan I can report that we never, ever say it enough when the parent is alive and kicking.

I don't feel guilty or anything but I do wish that I had been more frequent in my saying that I love my Mom and Dad.

They knew anyway just as I know that I am loved.

It is just that saying it makes it stand out in bolder type somehow.

So. It is just another day but it is not just another day.

I am thinking about my own Dad right now.

A great guy.

I am just now looking at a few of his pictures.

His love still warms me even though I have not been with him for almost 20 years.

And I love him back.

So I suppose that this day is important if it prompts such exercises in love.

Happy Fathers Day.

Labels: fathers